Perhaps I Am Not The Right Person To Ask This Given My Track Record Amongst Some Of Our Female Abers But Here Goes, Is It Condescending Or Even Sexist To Address A Female As Love?

[anotheoldgit]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2984961/Don-t-call-love-Tory-Nicky-Morgan-slams-Labour-star-condescending-jibe-heated-Commons-debate.html

[-Talbot-]

I hope not petal, I use it all the time.

[anotheoldgit]

Oh, and while we are on the subject.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2985642/Fury-MP-calls-Scots-leader-wee-lass-tin-helmet-Labour-whip-given-dressing-party-disgraceful-slur.html

[anotheoldgit]

naval

/// Depends on the tone used. ///

And how would one get a 'tone' over in the written word, love?

[Peter Pedant]

No of course you can ask whatever you like, love

I am sure we have had this before - I rang a tele something, and the girl answered, and I said "Oh A Darzet Accent, nice to hear one"
and she said "no Devon actually and you know what ? I was disciplined for calling someone 'Love' the other day."
and I said ' arrr dang oi ! " and then "in plymouth moi larver is common"

so AOG yup the answer seems to be 'yes'

[mikey4444]

Personally aog, I don't think its wrong. Its a friendly remark as far as I am concerned. But it will be interesting to see what the AB Sisterhood has to say on the matter !

[ummmm]

It's usually used in a friendly way but it would depend on the way it's used.

[UKSWF]

I agree with Talbot, it depends on the tone, I call men 'darling' or 'sweetie' but as an endearment never in a serious discussion - that would be condescending. I guess it is a bit of a minefield!

[jim360]

I don't think it can be called sexist. The school dinnerladies called me "love", and everyone else for that matter. It's just a turn of phrase for many people.

[Peter Pedant]

yeah I think if you said
luuuuurve.
rolled your eyes and smacked your lips with your teeth still in a jar at home,

he/she might complain

[Retrochic]

It really does depend whose saying it, to some (not in this case) its just a form of address, like pet,doll,dear,mate. In this particular case I am sure it was meant in a derogatory or condescending way. If someone on the market addressed my as 'love' I would think nothing of it,if I was in a business meeting and someone addressed me as 'love' then that ,to me,would have different cogitations. One of my sons friends mothers addresses me as 'mate' and to be honest it grates to the bone -don't know why, it just does.

[retrocop]

I suppose this rather sad lady should thank her lucky stars she did not serve in Parliament during the Churchill v Braddock era. She would do well to steer well clear of this site.

[naomi24]

Hate all those forms of address.

[anotheoldgit]

Yes I suppose it is all a matter of how it is used.

I wouldn't be against being called mate, say if a tradesman was to say, "sorry mate we are all out of stock of those".

But if another person was to say "now look here mate" in an agressive way, then that would not be acceptable and would most likely be replied with something like this, " excuse me, but I am not your mate".

[andy-hughes]

I'd agree with Retrochic on this - it's all about context.

To refer to a fellow MP in the House as 'love' is disrespectful, and Mr Hunt should be more aware of where he is and to whom he is speaking when he is engaged in his professional duties.

I personally don't use generic terms like this - simply because it is not the way I speak, not because I don't think it is appropriate.

Here in Stoke, the address du jour is 'mate' for a man and 'duck' for a woman - again I don't use either, but am called mate regularly by friends or strangers.

I do dislike hearing parents refer to their children as 'mate' - because you are not his / her 'mate', you are his / her parent.

So Mr Hunt should not wheedle and whine, he should man up, appolgise, and watch his language in future.

[sp1814]

Depends entirely on contrxt and who it's directed to.

To a close relative or friend or someone you want to establish an informal relationship 'love' is a perfectly innocuous word.

If I had a female boss, I would not call her 'love'.

It's simply not appropriate.

And it certainly wasn't appropriate in the context of a Parliamentary debate.

And we all make these distinctions - personally, I had to 'have a word' with a call centre worker (at my bank) who thought he could refer to me as 'mate'.

[Peter Pedant]

There is nothing wrong with ma'am ( mam and not marm )

I reserve Miss for the over-sixties, ( a small proportion reply " oo young man ! young man ! " from the comedy series of thirty years ago

Anglos have real difficulty with 'sir' which the Americans dont
I am getting used to calling much younger men 'sir' well you have to address them as someone, and I cannot stand 'pal' or uuugh 'mate'

[Peter Pedant]

sp - the youngsters arent taught to communicate with strangers - either at school or anyone else

it makes them unemployable at any front desk, and I feel so sorry for them

[jno]

And how would one get a 'tone' over in the written word, love?

why would anyone write it, though? It's a manner of speaking, but not one I'd ever use in writing.

[Retrochic]

Peter -I love been called 'ma'am'. One time we lived next to an American airbase in the UK and I used to go to the Naffi for groceries, I had to go through the gatehouse security and there's nothing nicer than been addresses as 'ma'am by a lovely uniformed polite US soldier!
We have a lovely man who works on the butcher counter in a local supermarket -he calls everyone 'madam' -in a conversation maybe 5 or six times madam if you know what I mean madam -one day he got really carried away and called me 'madam flower' -it made my day lol!