It's not enough for people down south to keep bleating that "You lost the referendum" without also considering the whole narrative.
It started, really, with that poll that gave the "Yes" vote a one or two point lead. And then Westminster panicked, and rushed off up north to try and bribe the Scots into staying. This really was not necessary, and it was enough to just let the poll speak for itself and remind all the "no" voters (that were always going to be a majority really) to actually turn up and vote.
But what Cameron and Miliband did was to throw all sorts of promises up north, almost literally begging the Scots to stay. This has been a complete disaster, for several reasons.
In the first place, the promises made can't be kept without the consent of Parliament, and inevitably (and rightly) they have been watered down somewhat after proper consultation. But the point is that the promises won't be kept, and politically this is a disaster for the Conservatives, who were already struggling in Scotland, and Labour, who have found themselves siding with the Conservatives. No matter that the promises had to go through consultation. No matter that Labour were siding with the Conservatives only in wanting to preserve the Union. The damage has been done.
Secondly, that the promises were made at all has allowed the SNP to claim that the referendum was only lost because Westminster lied, because of those promises. Not only has this allowed the SNP to sneer at the promises, it also provides a perfect excuse for defeat. This is almost certainly not true, but the narrative is there, and it's a claim that cannot really be disproven. No doubt some people ended up voting no on the assumption of greater powers -- but a vast majority will have done so solely on the principle of "Better Together". It doesn't matter. Once again, Westminster has made a promise that has a) been broken (although it shouldn't have been made) and b) appears responsible for the result (though it isn't really).
With this alone the SNP can paint it as a Pyrrhic victory. And the other fact is that SNP membership has skyrocketed since the result, and support for Independence remains at least as high as it did before, if not slightly higher (A recent poll suggests that support has dipped somewhat, but essentially it remains neck-and-neck between Yes and No camps at about 45% each).
The knock-on effect is that Labour support in Scotland has plummeted, SNP support has grown, and the question hasn't been settled. Really, the following thing needed to happen to shut the SNP up, and they didn't: Ed Miliband needed to stay the hell out of it.
The sad thing is that Cameron had got his approach right earlier. An impassioned speech to the Scots that said "Yes, you can manage on your own, but let's stay together instead." Perfect tone, really. None of this patronising doom-mongering. No pathetic attempts at bribery that he wouldn't be able to follow up on. If he'd stayed there all would have been well. Alas, he didn't.
As a final point, the vagaries of First Past the Post now play right into the SNP's hands in spectacular fashion. It won't take much of a swing in several seats for the SNP to build up a huge presence in Parliament (I'll try to work it out for this evening). Not only are the SNP shouting more than ever before, but their voice will have a real presence. Particularly devastating for Labour and the Lib Dems, of course, but the knock-on effect will hit everyone too.
Basically, the whole thing has been badly handled since that poll came out. It needn't have been, really. But the results have meant that the independence question is as far from being settled as ever. Who cares about the result? In politics, it's about the narrative. Everyone south of the border seems to be missing that; this will come back to bite them very badly soon.