Funeral/sex Offender

[Malachite]

I lost my Mum to cancer a few days ago and the funeral is coming up soon.
One of my relatives is a convicted sex offender who has served his time and is intending to come to the funeral and wake. I know that some of the other attendees might be bringing their kids, does anyone know for sure if this might be an issue, and if so, what would be the solution?
No guesses, presumptions or judgements please ...just informed answers. Thank you.

[hc4361]

Are you worried that he can't attend due to conditions on his licence or Sexual Offences Prevention Order; or is it the reaction from the other mourners that concern you?

[vetuste_ennemi]

I'm very sorry to hear about your loss, Malachite. I lost my first wife to cancer and it wasn't "good" (as they say now).

If you're expecting ars*les at the wake make sure you don't have a free bar.

[david small]

I would personally keep my mouth shut and my eyes open. This person wants to pay last respects to your Mum. Observe discretely, the last goodbye.

[Hopkirk]

I don't see a problem, unless someone is likely to cause a scene.

The children would not be at risk at a funeral with their parents there.

[waterboatman]

I agree with Hopkirk. I don't think he would be stupid enough to misbehave at a funeral. You say he's done his time, he may well be reformed.

[Cloverjo]

Being a sex offender does not necessarily make him a threat to children.

[calmck]

My condolences. If the offence was towards kids does he have any restrictions on him re being around children. No one can say if this would be an issue for other attendees it would depend on how they would react. Emotions will be high. A difficult situation. Could you have a word with your relative about him being willing to leave if necessary

[EDDIE51]

He has served his time! So he is now free to do as he wants ! This includes attending a relatives funeral! NOTHING you can do!

[EDDIE51]

I would be more worried if he had been convicted as a handbag snatcher or a pick pocket !

[hc4361]

Eddie, you can't possibly know that he is free to do what he wants.
Many sex offenders are released on licence or have Sexual Offence Prevention Orders when they are released from prison that restrict them from a lot of things.

[woofgang]

Eddie this may not be true. Does he have an order against him?

I don't think there is enough information here to give a reasoned answer....you needn't answer her but things to consider
The nature of his conviction...it may have been nothing to do with children.
Do other family members know of his conviction? What is their attitude?
Legally, unless it contravenes any sex offence order that he may be required to comply with, you can't stop him attending.

[EDDIE51]

I am assuming he has been released 'without condition!' . If so there is nothing you can do!

[woofgang]

why on earth would you assume that?

[naomi24]

If he's been convicted of offences against children just keep your eye on him and the children. I don't see there's anything else you can do.

[Peter Pedant]

I am sorry about that Malchite
I advise that you should not be prescriptive as to who and who deosnt turn up. They want to turn up and give thanks for your mums life and not pick up a kid.

many are called but few are chosen is a suitable biblical defence

[when Mr Smith a RAF sptifire pilot died whom I had known for 50 y, I was excluded form the funeral because an in law ( NOT a Smith, just a sort of walk-in) decided 'I didnt know him'] [ so I prayed for him on my own...]

[Peter Pedant]

oh various views
are you an agent the probatonand social services charged with enforcing orders you know nothing about?

No -clear answer to that

can you disinvite him ? yeah if you are organising the funeral but that causes alot of trouble. The McCains told Trump not to turn up to their fathers funeral ( 'I dont think you are a hero if ya just get cart")

will other funeral goers in later years clutch their now adolsecent wayward children to their bazooomz - and screech - if I had only known .....[ I wd never have attended and jonquil would never have done time for importuning - well she wd have done time ,we had to nail down the movables from the age of 3]
O god anything like my family - yes they will ! again and again
am I my brothers keeper is a useful AB catch phrase....

Concentrate on organing a decent send off
my dear mother intentionally didnt organise a wake for my dear father and we only found out as the congregation trooped out of the church

[Peter Pedant]

damn - - the clear answer is 'no'
NOT - there is no clear answer - there is a clear answer. it is 'no'
sozza

[Malachite]

Thanks for the answers and condolences. In the end, there was no issue/problem. It all went well.

[vetuste_ennemi]

Good, Malachite.