Wedding Seating Arrangements!!

[Smowball]

My eldest son is getting married this weekend. His fiancée has gone slightly bridezilla, but she’s entitled to. Anyway, the problem is that she is insisting on doing the traditional top table with her parents and my sons(me and my ex). I haven’t been with his dad for years and years - we split up due to his violent behaviour. He is a nasty, aggressive bully. But she has seated me and him at the top table, along with her parents, and has sat my husband in amongst the rest of the guests on a table of 8 people he doesn’t know. He’s really not happy and nor am I - I’m only going along with this for my son, but he knows I cannot stand my ex - he made my life a misery. This will also be the very first time that my husband has seen my ex, after 17 years!

[LadyCG]

You don't have to go through something like that just to suit the bride. She should take your feelings into account or she is just one selfish mare. Just tell them you're sorry but you cannot sit next to him.

[Ken4155]

Tell your son to grow a pair and insist your husband sits at the top table next to you. If your violent ex has to be on the same table, tell your son to sit him as far away from you and your husband as possible. Tell him, if he doesn't do this, you won't be attending!

[choux]

Oh dear, Smow. Looks like what should be a very happy occasion will be fraught for you with regards to your ex. Pity your son could not explain to his fiance how terribly difficult a situation this will be for you. It is a shame for your husband too. I think perhaps you should have a word with the wedding planner? Hope you can manage the day without too much pain - has anything worked for you to relieve the problem? x

[Ken4155]

Or that you will sit with your husband in the 'hoi-polloi' area.

[elliemay1]

Your present husband should be beside you and I think your son should respect your wishes.

[Patsy33]

No way would I sit by him!
This is going to spoil the day. You have to put your foot down Smow. You all need to sit down and work this out amicably. Good luck! x

[elliemay1]

//His fiancée has gone slightly bridezilla, but she’s entitled to//
I'm not sure why you think she's entitled to. Please explain

[barry1010]

Does your son want his dad at the top table?

[bednobs]

i personally would suck it up. then move when all the speeches were over

[barney4444]

You won't be laughing when you arrested and having lumpy porridge in the prison!!

[barney4444]

should be in wedding seats arrangement section.. you can see why I don't contribute much!!

[barney4444]

No should be in tax call section.. Will go back to my bed!!

[anneasquith]

Does your son like and get on with his father ?

[Peter Pedant]

i personally would suck it up.

tell all the non-likers that it only for an hour or two and they are welcome to have a little lie-down afterwards

[douglas9401]

I've been to a wedding with a similar setup and it didn't go well.

Number one son and father squaring up to each other and the bride, son's mother, trying to prise them apart.

History + drink = fireworks.

[evadora]

We had the same problem when my husbands son got married - hubby was at the top table with his ex wife and I was put on a table in the general area with people I did not know. My husband said that he was sitting with his wife (me) whether at the top table or the table I was allocated to. His new daughter in law said no and so my husband found a table with space for both of us and left his place empty at the top table. His new daughter in law was not happy and when his son pointed out that her mum was with her husband (not the daughter in laws father) she said that's different!! The newly weds managed 18 months before they split up. Apparently the last straw was when she wanted to sell up and move 50 miles away and buy the house next door to her mum.

[Peter Pedant]

History + drink = fireworks.

well, they arent gonna see each other for another few years so just as well settle the business now.....

[Peter Pedant]

I was at a wedding where the bride decided her family name was pronounced differently to what it was....

( you mean siddy-bot-erm instead of sidebottom? yup)

and half the audience remained infuriated for the whole of the speeches....

[Barsel]

Smow, I hope everything works out well and I hope you have a lovely time.

[anneasquith]

PP, you are in great form recently,to what do you attribute your ‘ happier place .?