I think the Chinese regularly tell the Americans where to go in private discussions, but they do appear to be more vocal internationally in their disapproval of late.
The USA has always been wary and careful when dealing with China because it is a slumbering power that no one wants to antagonise, not least because China has a standing army of well over two million men.
China will overtake the USA as an economic power some time in this century and the sparks may start flying when China begins to assert itself more forcefully on the political stage and demands greater access to fuel reserves around the world.
When the UN was set up, China wasn't the original representative of the Chinese people because Taiwan was recognised as the legitimate government. However, the power of the Chinese mainland could not be overlooked and this situation changed at American insistence, I believe. This may have had something to do with the old adage about it being better having potential enemies inside the tent peeing out, than outside, peeing in.
I think the reason the Americans are so paranoid about weaponry is their understanding that technical supremacy is their only military advantage over the Chinese and they are desperate to keep it.
I have to be honest and say I'm not really sure if this is the type of thing you were looking for in your question, but what the heck!