Sundays NOTW Headline

[-Zorro-]

Whats it gonna be ?

[admarlow]

Can I cheat and quess that the Express's has the word ''Diana'' in it?

[crete]

zorro find a cure for erectile disfunction.

[NH]

Well there are always certain templates one can follow:-

News Of The World- "Celebrity X (and/or) Celebrity Y in Object Z Related Scandal".

Daily Mail- "Now We Let Immigrants/Immigrant Prisoners X" (Where X is something very apalling).

Telegraph- similar to Mail, maybe not quite as immigrant-orientated.

Sun- Whatever happened on Saturday, no matter how trivial, wrapped up in an appalling pun.

Mirror- As Sun, maybe slightly less trivial.

Times- "Government Legislation Results In X,000 People Of Some Description Doing Something Or Other."

Guardian- "Government Legislation Might Cause Trouble Of Some Kind Or Another".

Fill in a few specifics, and you can probably write the entire papers before they're released.

[vehelpfulguy]

How about:

Heather McCartney says "Yes, and I am money grabbing scheming old bag"

[crete]

what about no one made me marry her from paul mc .

[NH]

OK, let's use my theory.
Kate Moss has been quiet since the whole coke scandal.
How about...

"Kate Moss and Pete Doherty in Inquiry over Fish and Playdo".

(shrugs)

[-Zorro-]

"Heather McCartney doesnt have a leg to stand on" says Paul's lawyer in Sunday Times

[admarlow]

..or Jonathan Ross was right, she does have 2 legs!

[smudge]

Daily Mail sues AnswerBankers for defamation of character!

[NH]

AnswerBanker NH sues Daily Mail For Thrill Of It

[smudge]

He, he! It's the way we tell 'em!

[shammydodger]

Premiership footballer sex scandal!

The scandal being that he was caught not having sex.

[ummmm]

'Heather Mills to do penalty shoot out for children in need'

[45703]

Heather McCartney-Mills is going to tell the judge, she needs the family pet parrot for her part as Long John Silver in Christmas panto, if she is to stand on her own two feet and earn a living.

[pricey1976]

Frank Bruno could be in there somewhere

[vehelpfulguy]

Seems it is Posh saying her boy Romeo has epilepsy.

http://www.newsoftheworld.co.uk/

[NH]

I think the front page on the actual paper was something like "X Factor Star in Cocaine Scandal".

Hey. Guys. Y'know what this means...

My template works! (OK, so my specifics weren't right. But I was being silly).

Shit, is the media really that predictable? Something's not right.

[admarlow]

what were the headlines for the express and the NOTW?