Backward step or forwards?

[Miss Random]

I've been living in Mallorca for two years and through my lack of language skills have not secured a well enough paid job to support myself (and my daughter).

When I was back on the IOM where I came from I was requested by a 'Private bank' to attend an interview, as they had heard about me through a third party. I attended some 3 weeks ago, and up until today had not heard anything so assumed they had filled the post.

I have now been requested to attend a second interview... fantastic news. Or is it?

Whilst I was flattered that a high profile company wanted to employ me, I haven't really considered the full implications of giving up my home here and moving back to the Isle of Hell.

The pay is really good, so I would be mad (in my financial circumstances) to not go for it.... bear in mind I haven't been offered it yet.
I just have a big doubt, is it a step back or a step forward?

Don't really expect any replies.... think I need to sit down and weigh up all the pro's and con's....
It helps to share it.

Missy
x

[Lady Muck]

Oh and there's me thinking you were asking me to dance!

Sometimes you need to take a step back to go forwards my dad is very fond of telling me.... Well he would, he's been trying to get me back to London for the last year and half. And he's not wrong, my support network is there and it'd bee a lot easier for me finacnially. However through sheer pig headedness and pride I'm not doing what the right thing probably is. But I don't have dependents.

Financially this job doesn't have to last forever, could even just help you get back on your feet until you're able to go back to where you actully want to be.

That said, I'm informed money isn't everything so why not weigh up what you have against what you don't and see if that's not enough for you.

China

[jno]

I suppose the IoM isn't quite as alluring as Mallorca, but is it really so bad? If you hate it for some reason, you probably shouldn't work there, you'll just resent it (and worse maybe resent your daughter for 'making' you work there). But if it's just boring, lack of nightlife or something, I'd be inclined to accept and buy a lot of books. As China says, it's not forever. And going back to your home town isn't really a backward step, not like taking on work as an office junior or something would be.

[Ethel]

If this is a large company there is every possibility that you could eventually work in another branch somewhere else, even in a different country.

Go for it.

[Miss Random]

Thank you Lady Muck, jno and Ethel,
You are agreeing with my common sense half of my brain.

I left there with lots of bad memories, but I could make some fresh good ones.

I do to a certain extent, resent my daughter.... she is at uni in London, won't get a job so I am financing her fully - yet has a much older boyfriend in Mallorca. So effectively, I will be returning to the IOM to work so that she gets the best life possible. Guess that's just what mothers have to do.

She is 19 and he is 42, so basically I am having to return to full-time drudgery to stop her giving up uni and having babies, which seems to be her wish.
I know it makes economic good sense, I'm just feeling a little aggrieved....
thanks for your support.

Missy
xx

[banjosister]

Hey Missy,

Just one thing that no one so far has mentioned, if you're offered the job you don't actually have to take it.

Go for it, circumstances may have changed a bit if and when you are offered the job.

xx

[Lady Muck]

At 19 I put myself through uni.. I did have the debts to prove it. Perhaps a little cord cutting exercise might help? Not in a mean way but at 19 she could stand on at least one of her own feet.

[jno]

I sort of assumed it was a young daughter... Yes, at 19 she could be gently introduced to the idea of contributing to her own upkeep. In fact your moving home to work would be a useful trigger for this to happen, maybe. (Guilty confession: jno jnr is still at home aged a bit older than that and living free of charge too; but is saving hard to buy a flat).