Editor's Blog1 min ago
ero english
Euro-English
The European commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as 'Euro-English' - as distinct from 'English US', 'English Canadian', 'English Australian' and 'English UK'.
In the first year 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly this will make the sivil servants exsited. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter - which will save on kasting kosts.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replased with the 'f'. This will make words like 'fotograf' 20% shorter.
The hard 'g' will be replased with 'j'.
In the third year publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the staj where more komplikated chanjes are possible.
Governments will enkoraj the removal of double leters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent 'e' in the langwej is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the fourth yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'. During ze fifz yer ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and similar chanjez vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After ziz fifz yer ve vil hav a rali sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!!
The European commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as 'Euro-English' - as distinct from 'English US', 'English Canadian', 'English Australian' and 'English UK'.
In the first year 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly this will make the sivil servants exsited. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have one less letter - which will save on kasting kosts.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replased with the 'f'. This will make words like 'fotograf' 20% shorter.
The hard 'g' will be replased with 'j'.
In the third year publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the staj where more komplikated chanjes are possible.
Governments will enkoraj the removal of double leters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent 'e' in the langwej is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the fourth yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'. During ze fifz yer ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and similar chanjez vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After ziz fifz yer ve vil hav a rali sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!!
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Very Good,
I was sent this 3 or 4 years ago.
http://forum.ebaumsworld.com/archive/index.php /t-66737.html
I was sent this 3 or 4 years ago.
http://forum.ebaumsworld.com/archive/index.php /t-66737.html
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