I will be the new God, Well I cant possibly do any worse, who will follow me?

[RATTER15]

I will allow Mother Nature to control all earthly things, with no extremes of rainfall, drought or cold, I will bless man and Woman with intelligence, love, compassion and understanding. You don't have to follow me or my Son as you will have free will, "you wont need to follow me but I will be your guide.

Thou shall not know of anger, bitterness, violence or aggression.
Thou shall love man and women as equals.
Thou shall not take any person, of any sex, creed or colour to be enslaved.
Thou shall love all living creatures as equals (But I ain't giving up meat, I'm still working on that one)
There will be no Heaven, there will be no Hell. At the end of your life you will rest in peace for eternity.
There will be no disease or suffering.
Though shall share of the crops that will grow from nurture.
Though shall never know of financial wealth or fortune or suffering from the lack of, for there shall be no money to exchange but to barter and exchange goods.
I will not have built any magnificent buildings for you to congregate to sing my praises or to beg my help or forgiveness.
I will see your pain or your sins and I will give you aid and forgiveness as I see fit.


OK, I need ten Commandments, come on guys and I don't want any from the original Ten Commandments and I don't want them carved in stone.

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.

I would welcome any further suggestion, im not perfect yet.

[boxtops]

Thou shalt be glad for what you have, and not keep comparing thy lot with other people's
Thou shall not fiddle thy expenses for personal gain
Thou will cultivate tolerance in all things

[joggerjayne]

1. Though shalt follow no other team than Brighton and Hove Albion.

2. Though shalt not impose Inheritance Tax upon thy subjects.

[joggerjayne]

... and Boxy's ... those were good too.

=0)

[joggerjayne]

3. Thou shalt not drive a soft top car with the roof up on a sunny day.

4. Thou shalt not wear any velour garment in public.

5. Thou shalt not keep going on and on about all the apps on thine fcuking iPhone.

[RATTER15]

Thou shall remember how to spell "thou" and not though!!

[Carakeel]

Nice! And how about :

There shall be no politicians and truth shall prevail!

[RATTER15]

JJ, thou shall not use unholy words!! no matter how it is disguised!!!!

[RATTER15]

Thou shall never create skinny women!!

[mccfluff]

thou should partake of merriement and enjoying the company of friends at every available opportunity

[joggerjayne]

Thou shalt learn that, just because thou can act a bit, does not mean that thy can sing ... and thou bunch of second rate soap actresses shalt cease from harping on about "wanting a career as a pop star"

[naomi24]

Ha ha. Good idea! Got to be better at it than the last bloke! Can I be your groupie?

We once formed a cult here called the Loonies - not to be confused with the Moonies - who met up for parties aboard the Ark. Sadly several of the members have since lost faith and abandoned ship - but there are still a few of us about.

So, ok, what are you going to call yourself? Or is it just plain old God?

[craft1948]

1. Thou shalt not worship false gods.....

[askyourgran]

Because thou art an all seeing god thou wilt forgive me everything.

thou shalt not publish an autobiography until thou art 60 years old.

Thou shalt stop being a pop star when thou reaches the age of 35.

[razza]

Thou shall not put stupid posts on here

[naomi24]

Ye shall not assume that I, your God, demand the impossible of you.

Ye shall not harbour guilt for being human.

Your own happiness, peace of mind, and well-being, and that of those around you, shall take precedence over your worship of God.

Ye shall not believe the teachings of religious literature, nor in the tales of magic contained therein.

Ye shall not believe the teachings of men who claim religion, for they are false prophets who bear false witness.

Ye shall not teach your children that for which you can offer no rational explanation.

Ye shall not teach your children that which will alarm them, or that which will burden them with unfounded guilt.

Ye shall erase the word 'sin' from all dictionaries, and ye shall banish all concept of sin from the face of the earth.

Sorry, got to dash - I have people coming to dinner - for my sins! I'll keep thinking though. :o)

[wildwood]

Thou shall be able to partake in the guiltfree consumption of chocolate, McDonald, chips, steak or any other traditionally fatty food without endangering your health or bodily shape.

Thou shalt not wear clothing if thou art a female of the Human species so moslem males shall die instantly when they cast their eyes upon thou heavenly (pardon the pun) shape. This commandment shall only apply when thou art between the age of 21 and 31.

Thou shall expire instantly when thou sends spam and virus via a technical device which shall be known as a computer.

Thou shalt worship no other... except Kylie Monoque.

Thou shall not use the word thou.

[Nadis]

Sorry! As I have free will I will be too busy sinning. Thanks for the offer though.

[MarkRae]

> Thou shall not put stupid posts on here

Especially when thou knowest not that it's thou *shalt*...

[naomi24]

I've just realised I used 'ye' instead of 'thou' and 'shall' instead 'shalt', but I claim mitigating circumstances because I was preparing a four course meal AND making up commandments. Now that's multi-tasking!! :o)

[naomi24]

God!! Hey God!! You haven't disappeared just like the last bloke did, have you? :o)