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Funny English notices from around the world.

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marval | 14:43 Wed 06th Jun 2012 | Jokes
11 Answers
Here are some signs and notices written in English that were
discovered throughout the world. No offence to anyone from these countries.


In a Tokyo Hotel:

Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a
person to do such thing is please not to read notis.

In a Bucharest hotel lobby:

The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.


In a Leipzig elevator:

Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.

In a Belgrade hotel elevator:

To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin
should enter more persons, each one should press a number of
wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.

In a Paris hotel elevator:

Please leave your values at the front desk.

In a hotel in Athens:

Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the
hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.

In a Japanese hotel:

You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

On the menu of a Polish hotel:

Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy
dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose;
beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.

Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop:

Ladies may have a fit upstairs.

Outside a Paris dress shop:

Dresses for street walking.

In a Rhodes tailor shop:

Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute
customers in strict rotation.

In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:

Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.

In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency:

Take one of our horse-driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages.

In a Swiss mountain inn:

Special today -- no ice cream.

On the door of a Moscow hotel room:

If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.

In a Budapest zoo:

Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable
food, give it to the guard on duty.

In an Acapulco hotel:

The manager has personally passed all the water served here.

In a Tokyo shop:

Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are
best in the long run.

From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner:

Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your
room, please control yourself.

From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo:

When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn.
Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance:

English well talking.
Here speeching American.
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I may be the only saddo,but had to giggle!lol
Outside an Asian temple: "It is forbidden to enter a woman even if dressed as a man"
Wheres that hotel in Japan were I can take advantage of the chamber maid ?
Question Author
I am afraid I don't know tony.
Oh my the more I read of this, the louder my laughter got. The one about the USSR - priceless. Thanks for a great laugh marval ...
Question Author
You are welcome chaptazbru
On a menu in Odessa: Fried Surgeons with potato free ( assuming they meant fried sturgeon and potato fris).
On a menu in Yalta: Fried savages. ( sausages?).
Question Author
I wonder what fried savages taste like?
On the dessert menu at a Mexican restaurant in my home town- Rich Chocolate Mouse
Love it!
Particularly like the USSR one, having had the fortune to have taken a brief peek behind the iron curtain before the fall of Communism there. I may be welcome to it but I'm grand thanks without it.

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Funny English notices from around the world.

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