News4 mins ago
The Aussie Version of Creation
In the beginning God created day and night. He created day for footy matches, going to the beach and BBQ's.
He created night for going prawning, sleeping and BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.
On the Second Day, God created water for surfing, swimming, and BBQ's on the beach, and God saw that it was good.
On the Third Day God created the Earth to bring forth plants to provide malt and yeast for beer and wood for BBQs, and God saw that it was good.
On the Fourth Day God created animals and crustaceans, chops, sausages, steak and prawns for BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.
On the Fifth day God created a Bloke to go to the footy, enjoy the beach, drink the beer and eat the meat and prawns at BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.
On the Sixth Day God saw that the Bloke was lonely and needed someone to go to the footy, surf, drink beer, eat and stand around the barbie with.
So God created Mates and God saw that they were good Blokes, and God saw that it was good.
On the Seventh Day God looked around at the twinkling barbie fires, heard the hiss of opening beer cans and the raucous laughter of all the Blokes. He smelled the aroma of grilled chops and sizzling prawns and God Saw that it was good.
Well, almost good.
He saw that the Blokes were too tired to clean up and needed a rest.
So God created Sheilas to clean the house, to bear children, to wash, to cook and to clean the Barbie, and then God saw that it was not just good.
It was better than that, it was Blo00dy Awesome!
He created night for going prawning, sleeping and BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.
On the Second Day, God created water for surfing, swimming, and BBQ's on the beach, and God saw that it was good.
On the Third Day God created the Earth to bring forth plants to provide malt and yeast for beer and wood for BBQs, and God saw that it was good.
On the Fourth Day God created animals and crustaceans, chops, sausages, steak and prawns for BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.
On the Fifth day God created a Bloke to go to the footy, enjoy the beach, drink the beer and eat the meat and prawns at BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.
On the Sixth Day God saw that the Bloke was lonely and needed someone to go to the footy, surf, drink beer, eat and stand around the barbie with.
So God created Mates and God saw that they were good Blokes, and God saw that it was good.
On the Seventh Day God looked around at the twinkling barbie fires, heard the hiss of opening beer cans and the raucous laughter of all the Blokes. He smelled the aroma of grilled chops and sizzling prawns and God Saw that it was good.
Well, almost good.
He saw that the Blokes were too tired to clean up and needed a rest.
So God created Sheilas to clean the house, to bear children, to wash, to cook and to clean the Barbie, and then God saw that it was not just good.
It was better than that, it was Blo00dy Awesome!
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