Whiskey (Adult)
Bernie and Ted were walking down the street when they saw two street dogs mating in the park. Bernie said, "That's just great. I do it like that with my wife every night."
Ted said, "My wife is unadventurous, she only likes to do it the old fashioned way. Give me advice how you get your wife to do this, I would also like to try it with my wife."
Bernie replied, "Give your wife two drams of whiskey and she will be all ready."
The next morning they met for their morning jog and Bernie asked, "How did it go?"
Ted answered, "It was great, but it took my wife eight drinks."
Bernie asked with surprise, "Eight drinks?"
Ted replied with a sigh, "Yes. After two she was more than willing to do it that way, but it took six more to get her out on the front lawn!"