Gardening

[marval]

I was carefully examining my tomato plants looking for caterpillar tracks.
When I got run over by a tank.


I hate my part time job as a leaf blower, the pay is terrible.
But if I was a gardener, I would be raking it in.


I was gardening when I saw I had left an empty patch.

So I put a rose bush there thinking 'Thistle do'


I used to have a job making furniture out of plants.
I'll tell you, it was no bed of roses.


I’m suffering a mole problem; he gives out confidential information to other
gardeners.


I have planted a Bay tree in my back garden.
I can't wait till it grows it's first window.


As I walked through the garden today I tripped and landed in the herb section. Surprisingly, I broke all of my ribs along with some fingers and both wrists. I guess I must have fallen on hard thymes.


I went to a 'bush n garden' convention the other day,
it was ridiculous I couldn't get a word in hedgeways.


My mate recently had a nasty accident with a lawnmower.
They had to do a com-post mortem.


I was doing the gardening this afternoon when a frog intentionally threw himself under my lawn-mower.
I guess he wanted to Kermit suicide.

[excelsior-1]

very good marval
i wonder where you dug those up from

[albaqwerty]

lol groan, groan, groan lol groan and groan

(Not necessarily in the right order!!)

Very good x

[marval]

I found them while I was having a treemendous clear out.

[excelsior-1]

didn't hedge your bets then

[marval]

No, I am branching out.

[excelsior-1]

really? .... you must be barking mad

[excelsior-1]

stumped yet?

[marval]

Not stumped, I have twigged it.

[tonyav]

Are you going to the hoe down tonight.

[excelsior-1]

excellent. i am glad you are getting to the root of the problem

[marval]

I am raking over whether to go or not Tony.

[tonyav]

marval make sure nobody grasses you up.

[excelsior-1]

funny responses tony (made me soil myself)

[marval]

If anyone does I will get to the root of who did it.

[tonyav]

Take your gun with you marval, you could mow them down.

[marval]

Weed better go together, in case there are a bunch of them.

[tonyav]

Well thats a bit of a thorny subject marval.

[marval]

It's alright Tony, I am not stalking you.

[tonyav]

And do we get to sing for trees a jolly good fellow at the hoe down.

[excelsior-1]

just shrub your shoulders