Ab Wife/husband Swap

[Barmaid]

Prompted by Bednobs in my F&D thread.

Make your own rules.

On offer: 1 47 y/o male. Knows where dishwasher is, but can't scrape plates. Unloads dishwasher into wrong cupboards. Punches brick walls when angry (hence splitting knuckles) and then moans when he can't find plasters. Sucks stuff up hoover that ought to be picked up and moans when hoover gets blocked. Moans he has too much to do, and gives me more to do when he goes out. Does things of monumental stupidity. Otherwise, loving, tactile, sexy, caring, ever so slightly daft, means well but is generally a bit of a muppet. loves cats. Cats love him (they are ***** too). Brilliant dad though.

Exchange welcome (on a temporary basis only since whilst he's a muppet, I'd quite like to keep him).

OK who's for swapping........ ;)

[craft1948]

Sorry BM I've nothing to swap with...............

[albaqwerty]

blast, it's only swapping.

[EcclesCake]

Mine goes away for 6-12 months at a time.

This might appeal to some!

[albaqwerty]

Him doesn't know what scraping a plate is.
Can't share the king size duvet either.

However, very caring and compassionate when a family member isn't well.

[B00]

No can do, but I've got an offer too...

42 year old semi housetrained male. Good for making you laugh (often unintentionally), crap at locating the laundry basket. Does the occasional houseworky type things ,but spoils it by announcing ithat he's done the dishes "for you". Can cook, but it takes forever, and the kitchen looks like Chernobyl afterwards.

Will swap for packet of cheese & onion crisps.*

(*or a packet of Frazzles)

[society]

LOL @ this thread

You know the saying - you know what you have, you don't know what you'd be getting.

[gness]

Barmaid......I have no-one to swap but the sexy has tempted me so don't let him go yet. I'm off round the estate to see what I can pick up.....you fussy? x

[Barmaid]

YOu can borrow for a couple of weeks, Craft!!!!!

[baza]

willing to swap wife for a suffolk punch lawnmower.

[emmie]

oh how i wish i did, some seem funny, and slightly bonkers.

[emmie]

baza, but you can't cuddle up to a horse..

[craft1948]

But what would I do with him? I have a cleaner and a gardener...........

[gness]

Do you have tights, Crafty?

[B00]

I forgot something...

Mine comes with an additional unused exercise back that was bought by him on a whim, it looks ever so shiny and is an excellent place to hang clothing.

[B00]

bike, not back*

[murraymints]

Free to good....ish home..

Untrained male of the species...can't cook does not know what a kitchen is...seems to have eyesight issues..can't find bedroom furniture to put clothes away....blind spots include laundry basket..waste bins..coasters for cups ..hooks for coats and towel racks....suffers extreme fatigue...hobbies include playing with toy trains and zombie films.....

Happy to arrange immediate transfer....Will deliver...

[cupid04]

The grass isn't always greener on the other side you know!
And who want's someone's left-overs anyway.
I'm quite happy with the one I got. Married 35 years next month.

[B00]

Why do they still play with toys? Mines got a Lego obsession thing going on!

[Psybbo]

Murray are you trading Tony?

[craft1948]

Yes gness......but I'm saving them for someone 'special'