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An Ode To Farts

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starone | 20:25 Sun 01st Sep 2013 | Jokes
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When the need to break wind is one that arises
Remember that fa*rts come in all shapes and sizes.

There is scarcely a sound to accompany some
While others erupt with great noise from your bum.

The worst are the ones with a bad eggy pong
That comes from remaining inside for too long.

The “squeakers” are sometimes surprisingly tame
The hot ones would put a sewer to shame.

But beware of the farts that emerge in a bubble
Misjudge one of these and you could be in trouble.

Taken from a birthday card!
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DTCwordfan
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There was a young man from Rangoon, Whose farts could be heard to the moon. When you'd least expect 'em, They'd burst from his rectum With the force of a raging typhoon. or: There was a young fellow from Sparta. A really magnificent farter. On the strength of one bean He'd fart "God Save the Queen," And Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata.
20:40 Sun 01st Sep 2013
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Avatar Image ducksie
^^neighbourhood, sorry for typos
23:05 Sun 01st Sep 2013
Avatar Image starone
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Just came back on line and read through more of this thread. I am passing the poems on to my sister. I am still laughing!!
09:51 Mon 02nd Sep 2013
Avatar Image marval
when I was younger we used to have this rhyme.

Beans beans are good for your heart
The more you eat the more you fart
The more you fart the better you feel
So eat baked beans with every meal.
14:37 Mon 02nd Sep 2013

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