What's Up Doc?
"I'm so worried," the elderly patient said as the nurse plumped up his pillows.
"Last week, I read about a man who was in the hospital because of heart trouble, and he died of malaria."
"Relax," the nurse said smiling. "This is a first-rate hospital. When we treat someone for heart trouble, he dies of heart trouble."
Doug goes to a doctor and says: "Doctor, my wife recently has lost her voice. What should I do to help her get it back?"
The doctor replies, "Try coming home at 3 in the morning!"
Audrey went into the doctor's office for her annual check-up, and the Doctor asked if there was anything unusual he should know about.
So Audrey told the Doctor that her dress must have shrunk over the last year, because it didn't fit when she went to get ready for a wedding recently.
The Doctor said, "Dresses don't shrink just sitting in a closet. You probably put on a few pounds."
"That's just it, Doctor, I know I haven't gained a single pound since the last time I wore it."
"Well, then," said the Doctor, "You must have a case of Furniture Disease."
"What in the world is Furniture Disease?" asked Audrey.
"That's when your chest starts sliding down into your drawers."