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marval | 18:42 Mon 24th Feb 2014 | Jokes
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A woman was in a sex boutique shopping for vibrators when the clerk said, "Perhaps you might be interested in this one. It's our most realistic model."

The woman said, "You mean it's shaped exactly like a man's pen!s?"

"No," the clerk replied, "I mean that after five minutes it goes soft for the rest of the night."


A young man was washed up on a deserted island.

After several years an attractive lady washed ashore.

She was delighted to see the young man and asked him how he had managed to survive.

He answered, "I've eaten bananas, coconuts, edible roots etc and dug for clams."

She then asked him about sex. He said he didn't know anything about it.

She asked him if he would like to learn. He said sure so she proceeded to teach him the ins and outs (no pun intended).

When they were through she asked him what he thought and he replied, "that was great but look what it did to my clam digger!"


An elderly couple in their 80's were about to get married.

She said: I want to keep my house.

He said that's fine with me.

She said: And I want to keep my car.

He said: That's fine with me.

She said: And I want to have sex six times a week.

He said: That's fine with me...Put me down for Fridays
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