If My Body Were A Car - By An Old Man

[marval]

If My Body Were a Car - by an Old Man

If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model.

I've got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a little dull...

But that's not the worst of it.

My headlights are out of focus and it's especially hard to see things up close.

My traction is not as graceful as it once was.

I slip and slide and skid and bump into things even in the best of weather.

My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins.

It takes me hours to reach my maximum speed.

My fuel rate burns inefficiently.

But here's the worst of it,

Almost every time I sneeze, cough or sputter.

Either My Radiator Leaks or My Exhaust Backfires

[Shaglene]

The truth hurts. Keep them coming..............

[frugalfred]

My big end's seized up.....

[zebo]

My tyres are over-inflated.

[janbee]

I'm definitely in need of the full MOT and would then fail every part of it, quite spectacularly. Too much rust everywhere.

[waterboatman]

Why are you talking about me? :o}

[janbee]

Oh Boaty, you are a streamlined Rolls Royce !

[waterboatman]

Flattery will get you everywhere tinks. ;o}