To Have Or Have Not....

[EcclesCake]

What are your thoughts when you encounter a childless couple, pity, respect, indifference?

Childless couples forever seem to be judged and I don't know why, much in the same vein I don't understand couples with more than two children being looked askance.

What on earth does it have to do with anyone else?

[Mamyalynne]

It would never occur to me to comment - if any conversation on the topic should arise it should be started by the couple in question.

[jackthehat]

I assume it's none of my business.......that's even if it occurs to me in the first place.

I know what you mean though; both Theresa May and Nicola Sturgeon have had to make public declarations about the issue.

[-Talbot-]

Total indifference.

[ummmm]

I don't think about it.

[EcclesCake]

I couldn't give a flip flop for how many kids my friends have, neither am I interested if they have made a considered decision to have none. I do feel uncomfortable amongst friends who want children and are going through IVF, I feel for them and their possible disappointment.

[ummmm]

In that situation, Eccles, I would feel pity. The desire to have children is so strong for some.

[Prudie]

I don't think about it either but would guess the attitude is a leftover from the days when it was assumed all couples would have children and those that didn't couldn't.

[bednobs]

i often wonder if they wanted children but couldn't have them, or whether there's some other story. I don't ask though (obviously)

[NoMercy]

My OH'S mother more or less hinted that we should get cracking with family expansion as soon as we got together. OH was 39 and I was 38 at the time.

[woofgang]

No thoughts at all about it. The only time I think about other people’s kids is when they are screaming in the garden and then what I think isn’t printable.

[DTCwordfan]

Prudie has it.....

There are so many reasons why and it's up to each couple how much they share with others....in my sister's case, it was a riding accident that has prevented her from having kids, IV tried but to no avail. We did have a family laugh over her OH who is huge into sailing. The joke was that when it came to his moment for the advancement of science, he didn't need a Mayfair/Penthouse, just a copy of Yachting Monthly..."Oh, she's got a nice bottom."

[mikey4444]

There are many reasons for childlessness, some of them being very private and medical. I wouldn't dream of commenting either way, unless invited to do so.

My sympathy goes out if people are childless due to reasons outside of their control. And if its by choice, then I respect that choice as well.

[ummmm]

""And if its by choice, then I respect that choice as well.""

Respect and totally understand it...

My aunt was 10 when I was born. She's chosen not to have kids :-)

[EDDIE51]

It is fine to be childless , but having kids does give you insight and experience of life to a depth that you just don't get if you are childless.
Can someone who has never been a parent really know what life is really like for a family with children?
I have learnt much from my 5 children and 12 grand-kids! both about them and about how to cope with problems.

[ummmm]

But some people don't want that 'insight'

[Prudie]

And can someone who has been tied down with a family really know what the world has to offer? Admittedly they are rich but my by choice childless brother/sister in-law live an amazingly full life travelling the world, eating out, ballet,opera, theatre - you name it they are free to do it.
Kids are a constant worry, even when they're grown up.

[Cloverjo]

I've never thought about it, really. I work with a couple of men who don't have kids. One is married, one single. Both in their 50s. They have both mentioned in passing that they never really wanted children. I didn't think anything of it.

[Mamyalynne]

It's ever been thus hasn't it , the old saying we've all heard "None to make you laugh and none to make you cry" sometimes said wistfully others times not.

Life is what it is though I do feel for those desperate and unable to have a family they desire.

[Cloverjo]

That's true, Prudie. You never stop worrying about them. My son is grown up, doing well and of course I wouldn't be without him, but it's a constant worry that something terrible might happen to him.

[Old_Geezer]

Overpopulating the world or the country, is everyone's business, as it effects us all.