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Studying Hieroglyphics

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marval | 18:05 Thu 23rd May 2019 | Jokes
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I have been studying hieroglyphics for a long time. I have come to the conclusion that it is rather difficult to spell.

I have just spent two hours watching a D.V.D. I really need to get a D.V.D player.

I applied for a job at an engineering firm to work on a lathe. They turned me down.

I bought a new mouse mat last night. I don’t know why I care for my rodents so much.

When my dad was a young bloke, he apparently didn’t conduct himself very well. Mind you, it was rather difficult seeing as he was a one man band.

I came home from work to find my partner having a good old spring clean. I don’t know why, it’s not like anyone looks inside a mattress.

I get a lot of stick for collecting bits of trees.

I lost the dog whilst out for a run with him this morning. “Why didn’t you take the lead?” asked my partner when I came home. “I did”, I replied, “but he overtook me after 100 yards and disappeared into the distance.”

My friend creates water features for a living, he is very good at what he does and there is nothing he doesn’t know. He’s a real fountain of knowledge.

A builder threw a handful of cement at my face, I was rendered speechless.


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