Bf's or Hubby's opinions...how important are they to you?

[Headless Rat]

Was just flicking through a few threads there- the ones about diets and looks etc. It seemed to me that when answering a question on how you feel about how you look, ie whether you think you're fat or not, whether you think you have big boobs or not etc etc, one of the most frequently used replies was "well boyfriend or the hubby seems happy so....!". To me this type of reply says to me that girls are happy and comfortable with how they look on the condition, only,that their significant other is happy too.I was brought up with the attitude that looks don't matter-they're mostly purely down to luck/genes (ie something you have no control over) and that it, ironically, is no reflection of what a person is like.What do others think?I know it' s nice to look nice for your bf or hubby...but it certainly shouldn't be made into too much of an issue.How far would you go to please your partner?

[kick3m0n]

lol HR...didn't mention any man in my thread....I'm pretty much in agreement with what you say :o) Yeah, nice to know your b/f hubby is happy with your shape/how you look, but if I was a happy skinny gal and my hubby was a chubby chaser, I wouldn't get fat for him. Similarly, the reverse is true. I'm the size and shape I am, bit less pert and taut post baby but totally happy with my body/look, and at an age now where if a guy doesn't like or appreciate it, that's his loss ;o)

[B00]

Ooooo a toughy!

Love does a weird thing ya know, it makes you love a perason regardless of how they look, even if they change for the worse, ya really don't care. You love that person for WHAT they are more than what they look like.

Yes we all like to look nice, and yes it's important that your husband, partner BF, whatever likes the way you look, but in the long run if you're in a stable happy relationship it's not the be all and end all.

[boobesque]

My boyfriend loves me for how i am, i hate how i look, i am losing weight (after baby born!) for me, not for him, so with regards to how i look i prefer to make myself happy, thats what matters to my partner as well.

[PinkFizz]

Hi,when I said that my b/f was happy with me I meant that even though aia would love to lose a few pounds he doesn't seem to notice(prob coz he's a chunky thing himself!!).

But if he asked me to lose weight then I wouldn't do it,unless I felt myself that I needed to.

[PatriciaH]

When is baby due boobesque? and how are you keeping...

[RATTER15]

I don't think looks are overly important, but it does help to be pleasant looking, something has to attract the other sex.
I don't think I would judge someone purely on looks unless they were a real minger!! there are limits!
I know beauty is only skin deep but unfortunately ugly cuts right to the bone.
I am fortunate to have a gorgeous partner, who thankfully share some of my views, I may be left as prey for the mingers if she didn't love me!!

[lethologica]

My boyfriend is far more content (even happy... ?!) with my appearance than I am. In fact he prefers I don't change my hair (or more significant features) in any way...

If I want to change things I tend to speak to him first - same way as I'd be shocked if he had an extreme change of hair cut or something without saying anything to me first...

Maybe that sounds a little posessive, but we've been together nearly 5 years and it hasn't caused problems yet!

[metagirl]

I don't think there is anything sinister in wanting your husband or boyfriend to like the way you look. Being married, I find that I stress about my appearance a lot less than I did when I was single. Instead of trying to please every single guy out there, you just have to try to please one! And husband's are a lot easier to please.

[Carakeel]

I certainly don't judge people primarily on their looks. Their character is so far more important to me. We all have so called 'flaws' in the way we look, or at least that is what the fashion and beauty industry would call them. But, these 'flaws' are to me just differences; the little things that make each of us unique and interesting. I see my own features as being at best average. I have a fairly nice face, nice eyes & hair for my age. But in my view, the body could do with a lot of improvement. When I dress and put makeup on, I honestly do it for myself! Making myself look nice makes me feel better and gives me a better start to the day. Thankfully, I have a lovely partner, who never lets me feel as though I am not beautiful. Through choice and traumatic circumstances, I stayed without a partner for over 20 years. During all those years I put just as much effort into the way I look every day, as I do now. Maybe it has something to do with self-respect?

[Carakeel]

Although I would not change my look for anyone, unless I was convinced that it would make ME look and feel better, I would also never dress in a way that would embarrass my partner, myself or anyone else I care for. Long ago I did allow my now ex- husband to tell me what to wear � big mistake. It was a control thing with him and made me look 20 years older that I was at the time. I stay true to myself now and always will! Have to say, it is so wonderful having such a wonderful and caring partner, who loves every inch of me, lumps and bumps included!

[boobesque]

Patricia, any time now, been in slow labour for over a week, going in tonight as i am in quite a lot of pain now, hopefully tonight may be the night!

[joby1]

good luck boobesque,, thinking of you. xxxx ;o)))

[whiskeysheri]

Lots of love & luck, boobesque :o) xxx

[PatriciaH]

i will be thinking of you, if you dont reply wel all know youve been kept in and i hope all goes well for you and baby xx