Made me giggle!

[valsuey]

Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands Police say that he topped himself
.

[Thunderbird+]

Teh heh, maybe he *flaked out ;-)

While a police station was having a refit, thieves walked in posing as builders and stole the toilet basins, leaving gaping holes in the floor.
Police say they have nothing to *go on* but they're *looking into it.

[coinman]

hey this subsection suits my mentality!!!!

police apprehended two thieves, one for stealing batteries, the other for taking fireworks.
a spokesman said they charged the one and let the other off.

[Thunderbird+]

Police caught two thieves after they stole a calendar from an office block

They was both given six months each.

[pixie_woo]

An oldie but a goodie...

A lorry containing wigs and toupees has crashed on the the northbound M5...
Police are combing the area for clues.

[valsuey]

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

[smiffy65]

something very funny take a look
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/llama.ph p

[JonnyBoy12]

Today a hole was found drilled in the wall of a nudist colony. Police are looking into it!

[JonnyBoy12]

Today a found a massive bulge in my trousers. Thinking that something may be medically wrong I went to the doctor. He says there is nothing to worry about but I think there may be a **** up.