Thermos flask

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A farmer was getting ready to go to work one morning when he accidentally broke his thermos flask. He couldn't find a piece of paper so he wrote "thermos flask" on the inside of an empty packet of contraceptives and gave it to his wife, asking her to buy a replacement when she went into town. She took the note to Boots and handed it to the assistant. Unfortunately she handed it over upside down, so that it read "Durex Condoms" She asked the assistant "Can I have one of these for my husband, please? Better make it two pint size - he's on the job fifteen hours a day."