Mock the week style question, leave you answer!

[what..the?]

Things an estate agent won't tell you!

[dolly pond]

that u r an anoying t$$t who thinks they have the best house ever, when actually its no better than the neighbours

[dolly pond]

That they hate u with a passion, with your annoying whiney " oh, i love the sofas" and then u think to yourself "u t$$t u r buying a house, not the sofas

[dolly pond]

we also will not tell u that its got 16 illegal immigrants next door

[dolly pond]

or, we will not tell u that your buyers stink of BO and stale fags and look like tramps, and they will not get on with your lovely old neighbours

[dolly pond]

we will also not tell you that at night, the snooker club two doors down holds an elvis night and 104 elvis bikers turn up for a rave until 4am and thats why the house has been for sale for 4 years

[dolly pond]

we also will not tell you that we hate your house, the road, and u for fear of losing the instruction

[dolly pond]

we will also fail to inform you that the smell is rotton floors and the old man who lived there used to pee all over them

[flip_flop]

The truth.

All Estate Agents are pathological liars.

[dolly pond]

and, unless we are stupid and never want to sell your 3 bed semi, situated next to a perverts house, we will only do viewings when the perverts are at rehab (mon, tue and fri 10-11am)

[dolly pond]

i`m not!! i`m scarily honest, i point out lots of positives and constantly sell more than anyone else, cos i`m annoyingly bubbly and enthusiastic, even if your house has been built on a sewer! i have a positive answer to anything thrown at me!! try me xxxxx

[dolly pond]

i did a viewing recently at a house which had a dodgy, illegal extension, smelt of wee, poo and dogs, and i struggled to find anything nice to say. so i took my buyers upstairs and said "wow!!! look at that view across birmingham" stunning. at which point they fell about laughing!!

[dolly pond]

on saturday, i did 15 consectutive viewings! had to remain all excited and annoyingly happy for 8hrs solid. did it even though 4 people were late, one couple stank of beer, bo and cigs, one guy was drunk, and one guy looked at 5 flats in a block and made me run up and down 10 flights of stairs.

now, if u think we are all bad, please come spend a day with us. we work (well my office) hard, 50+hrs a week, take abuse on the hr, every hr from the public, but still have to sound like we are on happy pills all day xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Zen]

Your neighbours include,Chris Langham,Gary Glitter and Pete Townsend so you will never be short of a babysitter for the kids.

[flip_flop]

Well perhaps it is just my experience of estate agents - I have moved three times in the last five years (we have a low boredom threshold) and found every estate agent we had the misfortune of dealing with being utterly incapable of telling the truth.

They received a �6k fee from us last time for doing as close to f*** all as they could - and lying.

[dolly pond]

poor flip flop! we at our renowned office, work our tits off!! chase and push all the time, we never lie, but i have to admit, we are unique! come to me next time, i`ll look after u and ensure u never feel stressed or uptight. a chap told me today "my god, u are mad, are you single? you sound well bubbly" that made my day!! better than being a misery

[shomer42]

That they really couldn,t care less whether they sell it to you or someone else, just buy it so they get paid the commission!!!

[dolly pond]

sometimes true! we act for our vendors to get as much money as poss, from the best buyer, ie shorter chain, mortgage ready sols instructed, but then i work for a huge corporate.
let me off early today as ill

[flip_flop]

My last house purchase I offered the asking price, subject to the vendor taking it off the market. My house had already been sold to somebody coming back from Oz and my vendor was going in to a retirement home - so no chain.

This was agreed over a handshake during the viewing (which the estate agent didn't attend) and he then phoned the agents in my presence and told them no more viewings, the house was sold.

A week later he phoned me to ask if I had pulled out of the sale, because the agent had arranged for two new viewings that day!!!

They are duplicitous guttersnipes for doing such a thing - or, possibly even worse, just simply incompetent.

[dolly pond]

thats disgusting!! i would have gone mental if that had happened to me! some estate agents employ really dumpb people who dont communicate, u poor thing! come to me next time, we have 30min morning meetings, regular updates on EVERY sale, offer etc throughout the day, so much so, u know everything about everyones business! so that would never happen at my office. we are not all bad xxxx

[topogigo]

You are ******* me off i don't know about the rest of them.
I don't think anyone has ever answered a Q. so many times!