Four year old having major temper tantrums

[lil123]

My 4 year old little boy has started in the past 2 weeks having really bad temper tantrums where he is getting more aggressive and saying he is going to bite, hit etc unless he gets what he wants.
I am trying the naughty step and have stopped his treats and didn't take him out today on a treat we normally go to as his behavior was so bad this morning.
It is putting such a strain on my relationship with my partner who is not my son's father but has been around since my son was 2.
I bought him a night light as I was having trouble getting him to bed which seems to be doing the trick.
Any ideas or tips please ?
Thanks

[dothawkes31]

He is too old to have temper tantrums, he must be copying someone else's behavior, does your partner shout alot and make a fuss?

[sophie_1003]

Whatever you do, do it consistently. Explain why he is getting punished and give specific praise for good behaviour rather than just saying 'Good boy'. Is he at school/nursery? if so talk to the teacher to establish what he's like there and they might be able to give you some support.

[lil123]

Thanks Sophie. My Partner is really good with him doesn't shout much at all. I felt he was coping behavior he had seen as well so I am going to speak to the school etc

[beanebabe]

You are doing the right thing by depriving him of treats etc if he is naughty. You do have to be consistent and mean what you say. The other thing to do is ignore him when he kicks off. Go to a different room, turn your back on him, do the chores etc. Also praise him when he is good and make time each day to do something together. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt (in every colour). Good luck.

[Schlomo78]

Aw, hon, exactly there with you right now. Having that with my 3 1/2 year old. Just think it's a bloody boundary thing. My son will push,push, push, he knows his boundaries, but he also knows I am a little more lenient with him when my partner is around as opposed to on my own...simple stress relief from having someone else around...naughty step the bugger, 2 warnings, then step-I get serious, he's like a mini teen. He's pushing, don't play the game! Rules, and rules and use your partner reading him a story as a treat, also. My wee beasty has a night light, and I leave the hall light on til he's asleep. I'm soooo glad i'm not the only person going through this!! :*
Hope everything works out, you have to repeat and repeat and repeat the naughty step/circle (and God, don't I know how bloody tedious it is?!) and let your partner do it too, it makes more of a difference to my son when my partner does it, simply beccause he's not used to it! Tc hon x

[ELVIS68]

Good replies, at least you are concerned about it and are asking for help, my wife looks after our friends 8 year old and he is a nightmare in his own house yet when he is round our house he knows the rules and is as good as gold
Whenever we are round their house he runs around like a lunatic shouting and hollering and his mum and dad let him get away with it

You are doing the right thing