Bathroom troubles
Three old men are sitting on the porch of a retirement home. The first says, "Fellas, I got real problems. I'm seventy years old. Every morning at seven o’clock, I get up and I try to urinate. All day long, I try to urinate. They give me all kinds of medicine but nothing helps."
The second old man says, "You think you have problems. I'm eighty years old. Every morning at 8:00, I get up and try to move my bowels. I try all day long. They give me all kinds of stuff but nothing helps."
Finally, the third old man speaks up, "Fellas: I'm ninety years old. Every morning at 7:00 sharp, I urinate. Every morning at 8:00, I move my bowels. Every morning at 9:00 sharp I wake up."