DUMB LAWYERS3

[laurababy]

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
> WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
> ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
> WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town, I'm going with male.

[jno]

people are so unkind about lawyers.

What do you call 100 lawyers buried up to their necks in sand?

Not enough sand.

People don't talk about accountants like this.

[dundurn]

I like the one about the lawyer desperate to find any loophole that might indicate his client did not kill the victim.

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient as alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

[jno]

laurababy was there before you, dundurn

http://www.theanswerb...s/Question929380.html

[dundurn]

Missed the chain of events there - came in at no 3!

[roger]

what do lawyers and sperm have in common ?
one in a hundred million has chance of becoming a human being