Crosswords1 min ago
Some more church bloopers
1. The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning.
2. The eighth graders will be prsenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement Friday at 7pm. The congregation is invited to this tragedy.
3. Weight watchers will meet at 7pm at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double door at the side entrance.
4. The Lutheran Men's group will meet at 6pm. Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal feel.
5. The Associate Minister unveiled the churche's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday, "I upped my pledge - up yours."
6. Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
7. The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.
8. The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.
9. The concert held in the Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who laboured the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.
10. The pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary.
11. Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa will be speaking tonight at Calvary Memorial Church in Racine. Come tonight and hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.
12. Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands.
13. Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
14. This evening at 7pm there will be a hymn sing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
2. The eighth graders will be prsenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement Friday at 7pm. The congregation is invited to this tragedy.
3. Weight watchers will meet at 7pm at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double door at the side entrance.
4. The Lutheran Men's group will meet at 6pm. Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal feel.
5. The Associate Minister unveiled the churche's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday, "I upped my pledge - up yours."
6. Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
7. The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.
8. The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.
9. The concert held in the Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who laboured the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.
10. The pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary.
11. Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa will be speaking tonight at Calvary Memorial Church in Racine. Come tonight and hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.
12. Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands.
13. Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
14. This evening at 7pm there will be a hymn sing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
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One Sunday morning, the priest told his congregation that he was going to say a series of words, and he wanted them to sing the song that each word brought to mind.
First he said "Rock", and they sang "Rock of Ages".
Next he said "Blood", so they sang "Power in the Blood."
His third word was "Cross," and they began singing "The Old Rugged Cross."
The fourth word he said was "sex". Everyone gasped, and it went very quiet. Then, in the back of the church, an 87 year old lady started singing "Memories". .
First he said "Rock", and they sang "Rock of Ages".
Next he said "Blood", so they sang "Power in the Blood."
His third word was "Cross," and they began singing "The Old Rugged Cross."
The fourth word he said was "sex". Everyone gasped, and it went very quiet. Then, in the back of the church, an 87 year old lady started singing "Memories". .
1 to 6 of 6
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