Quizzes & Puzzles3 mins ago
friday afternoon complain
52 Answers
names have been changed to protect the guilty. but this is a genuine complaint i have received.
Hi i wud like to put in a complaint bout the man who delivers ur paper down our road..on 7th july on station rd ***** the man dliverd our paper, at 2.30pm..i looked outta the window to see him standin in my 90yr old neighbors garden doin a wee up her fence. I went out to confront him, i askd him if he knew how to use a loo, his reply woz he woz bustin for a wee. I then told him my 7yr old dawta cud ave seen that his reply woz she shudn be lookin!..i,v told him hes disgustin! U print an article today bout a flasher down station rd yet 1 of ur dlivery men are goin round doin that..if no action is taken i will take this furtherr
Hi i wud like to put in a complaint bout the man who delivers ur paper down our road..on 7th july on station rd ***** the man dliverd our paper, at 2.30pm..i looked outta the window to see him standin in my 90yr old neighbors garden doin a wee up her fence. I went out to confront him, i askd him if he knew how to use a loo, his reply woz he woz bustin for a wee. I then told him my 7yr old dawta cud ave seen that his reply woz she shudn be lookin!..i,v told him hes disgustin! U print an article today bout a flasher down station rd yet 1 of ur dlivery men are goin round doin that..if no action is taken i will take this furtherr
Answers
I once lost a case for someone against whom the evidence was overwhelming .
I received this little " bijou".
Dear Miss BM
Your (sic) a C***
Yours sincerely
Defendant who lost
Funnily enough, part of the case was to do with harassment by sending offensive letters..... ....
I received this little "
Your (sic) a C***
Defendant who lost
15:36 Fri 08th Jul 2011
One of my favs that I have seen
Dear Dairy Crest,
What’s the best thing on my bread?
Not butter – something else instead!
It’s the best thing on my toast,
It’s the spread I love the best…
Carapelli! Firenze! There’s nothing I like more than sitting down with some freshly burned toast and slathering on plenty of Carapelli Firenze with a big spoon, then eating the delicious result. Mngh…
I am writing to you to show you my poem (above) and to tell you about something that happened about the my most recently tub o’Carapelli..
There was nothing odd (car)a(pelli)bout the tub – it looked normal, and it tasted normal too (or rather, ‘carapellinormal’, or ‘delicious’). I bought it on Monday August 4th, and ate a little on some sandwich carrots that evening. I put it back in the fridge, with the lid on to stop smells from invading, and went to bed. The next morning, I opened the fridge to find that my tub had morphed into a bag of spanners. A cloth bag full of big rusty spanners. How odd!
Has this happened to any of your other customers? It has certainly never happened to me before. I had some cheese in my fridge once that went mouldy, but that’s not really the same. I do love Carapelli Firenze, but I’m afraid I must insist on some compensation. True, a whole bag of spanners would normally be compensation enough for one morphed tub of spread, but my new spanners are too rusty to be worth anything.
Please get in touch.
Yours, ........
Dear Dairy Crest,
What’s the best thing on my bread?
Not butter – something else instead!
It’s the best thing on my toast,
It’s the spread I love the best…
Carapelli! Firenze! There’s nothing I like more than sitting down with some freshly burned toast and slathering on plenty of Carapelli Firenze with a big spoon, then eating the delicious result. Mngh…
I am writing to you to show you my poem (above) and to tell you about something that happened about the my most recently tub o’Carapelli..
There was nothing odd (car)a(pelli)bout the tub – it looked normal, and it tasted normal too (or rather, ‘carapellinormal’, or ‘delicious’). I bought it on Monday August 4th, and ate a little on some sandwich carrots that evening. I put it back in the fridge, with the lid on to stop smells from invading, and went to bed. The next morning, I opened the fridge to find that my tub had morphed into a bag of spanners. A cloth bag full of big rusty spanners. How odd!
Has this happened to any of your other customers? It has certainly never happened to me before. I had some cheese in my fridge once that went mouldy, but that’s not really the same. I do love Carapelli Firenze, but I’m afraid I must insist on some compensation. True, a whole bag of spanners would normally be compensation enough for one morphed tub of spread, but my new spanners are too rusty to be worth anything.
Please get in touch.
Yours, ........
Actually, they're mainly questions we get emailed, instead of complaints. Not quite as exciting... They are a bit "Trustan 40" however:
"I purchased an Indesit Fridge/Freezer nearly 2 years ago and suspect that the fridge is not as cold as it should be. What thermometer could you suggest and what should I set it at? The handbook gives no instructions save for "set on cold"."
"I have a UNI-COM doorbell which chimed a \"ding-dong\" upon change of batteries it now \"purrs\" likw thw old trill-phone. How can I change it back?
The model no. 54535"
"SHOULD ANYONE NEED OR WANT PARTS OR A LEINAD GUN CONTACT US FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO PURCHASE IT EVERYONE NEEDS TO KNOW LEINAD GUNS ARE STILL BEING MANUFACTURED" (may have posted this one before)
"I'm trying to keep you in a job. No contact details, you probably live in Slough or some other nasty, uneducated area. Moderate this you Fluffing Finance Specialist :D" (Okay, so this is a complaint)
"I purchased an Indesit Fridge/Freezer nearly 2 years ago and suspect that the fridge is not as cold as it should be. What thermometer could you suggest and what should I set it at? The handbook gives no instructions save for "set on cold"."
"I have a UNI-COM doorbell which chimed a \"ding-dong\" upon change of batteries it now \"purrs\" likw thw old trill-phone. How can I change it back?
The model no. 54535"
"SHOULD ANYONE NEED OR WANT PARTS OR A LEINAD GUN CONTACT US FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO PURCHASE IT EVERYONE NEEDS TO KNOW LEINAD GUNS ARE STILL BEING MANUFACTURED" (may have posted this one before)
"I'm trying to keep you in a job. No contact details, you probably live in Slough or some other nasty, uneducated area. Moderate this you Fluffing Finance Specialist :D" (Okay, so this is a complaint)