Does Everyone Treat All Their Children Equally Regardless Of Their Circumstances?

[dave50]

A friend of ours was left a substantial amount of money by a relative and wanted to pass on some to their three children. When he was telling us about it he said that he was going to give less to one of them because in his words 'she doesn't need it as much as the other two' which I thought was unfair. Surely they should always all be treated equally no matter what their personal circumstances or else you are favouring one over the other. What do others think?

[emmie]

split three ways, or not at all.

[ummmm]

I think you have to have more details about their personal circumstances before you judge.

[China Doll]

Meh... depends on the family. I'm better off than my younger sister so I wouldn't take it as a personal slight if she got given a bit more money than me, she needs it more.

[shoemad]

I agree with you.
I have three grown up children and would never dream of giving more to one than to the others. It's not a case of who needs it, maybe one has worked harder than the others. Why should that child be punished for working hard and making a success of life. Plus, if it was me, I would be hurt if my siblings were given more than me and would certainly feel that they were being treated more favourably.

[emmie]

shoemad, me too,

[cazzz1975]

I think it depends on the family and the situation, I dont think there is ever one set rule.

[emmie]

the one thing i know about family is the rivalry and upset when it comes to dividing up an estate when a parent or parents pass away, it's a nightmare of who gets what, and can break a once close knit family of siblings.

[China Doll]

I don't see it makes a difference. I know I'm loved as much as my sisters, I wouldn't equate not having the same money given to me as me not being loved as much. My dad often gives money to my youngest sister, it makes not a jot of difference to my life.

[cazzz1975]

I agree with that china

[Sqad]

I can't see the logic in that if one is "well off", he deserves less, as he probably worked harder than the other siblings in which case he deserves MORE.

No, it may be difficult, you may have to grit your teeth...but equal shares is the only fair way in my opinion.

[ummmm]

I agree with China. It doesn't matter.

[ummmm]

It has nothing to do with how hard someone works. Do you not people who work in care homes work hard?

[tamborine]

difficult, as 'needs must'. Middle son asks for loans for stupid purchases, ie boys toys. Eldest son with 3 kids wants his 'inheritance share' now to buy a bigger house; coz his kids might be adults before I pass on. Daughter wants the whole property & plans to buy out the bruvs.

dilemma dilemma ?????????????

[Sqad]

I can't see what "love" has got to do with it.

[cazzz1975]

thankfully not all children are eager to raid the family estate

[society]

Again I agree with China.

[society]

Sqad, are you back-up singer for Tina Turner? :)

[Sqad]

ummmm....fine....if hard work and endevour has nothing to do with it then give the money to whom you fancy for what ever reasons you might think up.

[Sqad]

society...LOL

[ummmm]

You share it out equally if your children have equally cared for you.