Call The Police

[marval]

The police are called to an apartment and find a woman holding a bloody 5-iron standing over a lifeless man.

The detective asks, "Ma'am, is that your husband?"

"Yes" says the woman.

"Did you hit him with that golf club?"

"Yes, yes, I did."

The woman begins to sob, drops the club, and puts her hands on her face.

"How many times did you hit him?"

"I don't know, five, six, may be seven times, just put me down for a five."


A police officer was investigating an accident on a two-lane, narrow road in which the drivers had hit virtually head-on.

One driver, an extremely elderly woman, kept repeating, "He wouldn't let me have my half of the road!"

After gathering as much information as possible, he angrily approached the other driver, who was examining his own damage.

The police officer asked, "That old lady says that you wouldn't let her have her half of the road. Why not?

In exasperation, the man turns from his smashed car and says.

"Officer, I would have been happy to give her half of the road, if she had just let me know which half she wanted!"

[tonyav]

LOL, like them, marval especially the second one.

[askyourgran]

lol...zig and zag it could have been my mate.

[zebo]

Sounds like my OH, he likes to try out all the lanes on the motorway before he decides which two to straddle.
Here in Norfolk, it seems to be the rule in car parks never to park in one bay, drives me mad.