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The Answerbank Summer Fetete - Part 2

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mrs_overall | 02:58 Fri 11th Sep 2015 | ChatterBank
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In the village of Answerbank under the Wold (twinned with Ooomegoolies, Australia), the fete Chairman, Whiskery Ron continued to supervise the setting up of stalls.
At the Guess the Weight of the Cake stall, Boo was looking decidedly green about the gills.
"I only ate a teeny bit from underneath the cake and now I feel sick" she moaned.
"Oh you fool" said Ron. "You should never have eaten any of it, Psybbo baked it."
They both shuddered at he same time.
"If that wasn't bad enough, Psybbo has booked a stall to sell her homemade cup cakes" said Ron.
"Dr Sqad and Mamya will be kept busy today then" said Boo with a grimace as she reached for a bucket.
Ron moved on and spotted Craft adding the final touches to her tent. She was wearing her fortune tellers outfit (made from old curtains she found in a skip), several diaphanous scarves, numerous beads and jangly bracelets and was looking rather sweaty. As the village postmistress, she had spent an hour steaming open a few last minute letters to try and glean any information regarding the addressees.Drawing herself up to her full height of 3'8" she fussed about with her tent which she had "borrowed" in the dead of night from the Scout hut.
The stalls were a true mish mash of items for sale. AOG was selling back issues of the Daily Mail, Gness was selling numerous Guiness related items and ornaments she had collected over the past 70 years.
Ron shook his head sadly as he spotted Marval's stall. Marval had hired a stall and had been vague at the time of the booking, saying the items for sale were safety related it. The table was piled high with condoms of every conceivable size, colour and flavour and were only just slightly out of date.
Ron moved swiftly to a large van which had backed through the gates. He recognised it as Sunny Dave's van.
"Morning Dave. What are you up to?" ask Ron in a fake cheery voice.
"I am doing a moped stunt display with the assistance of a few mates. We'll be jumping through burning hoops and that sort of thing on our Honda 50's"
Ron patted the fete insurance policy in his pocket as he moved on.
Humbersloop was adding the last bucket of water to a child's paddling pool and then put up a sign saying "Zorbing - only £5 a go!"
Ron had no idea what Zorbing was but told himself if it only involved a small paddling pool then it couldn't be too dangerous.
Hearing raised voices, Ron turned and saw several of the villagers having a heated argument outside the Lost & Found Children Tent.
With a sigh, he headed towards them.


TO BE CONTINUED
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Love it Mrs.O. :o}
...and the band played on.....lol..can't wait for the next episode....hope sloopy is on standby to douse moped boy when his new biker suit..the one with the go faster stripe...erupts into flames....will Tony bring his Billy to the pets pen ?...the vet said it would recover and any lasting damage will be psychological...ooo I am so excited I could crush a grape..... will there be a glam Granny comp ??
Errrr.....Mrs o ...... Have you ever actually spoken to an inhabitant of Ooooomdegoolies ?? Given that they are all green, hairy and totally deaf, and they don't actually speak an understandable language and spend most of their time in the dark looking for their goolies !!!

I can't imagine anyone in their right mind twinning with that .....err ....blot on the landscape ... How ever did that come about ....there's any number of quite reasonable pleasant places over here .....perhaps you could rethink this compete disaster ?? Very wishe from down under skz
perfect twinning for the Fetete of Answerbank under the Wold.

(shall I make a note of his name mrs overkeen?
you still got the pen lady ??
gness has been collecting ornaments for seventy years? was she a late starter?
oh yes minty and the little book. we have discussed the names and their transgressions and suitable 'remedies' but I can't disclose any more than that to you. my lips are sealed.
EEK..I have been a good girl..honest...
ooooooooooh ael. dead meat.

hurries away to tell gness what was said about her.
Gness has the cattle prod...better run ael..FAST...
i was considering reporting myself once i saw my post in black and white

a bit of grovelling..a few Hail Marys and a Guinness or two when the beer tent opens may be your saviour !!
///Ron turned and saw several of the villagers having a heated argument ///

Come on, it's getting a bit far fetched now, MrsO. x
There is a bit of a pong coming from my van I'm afraid.

My motto is "Sic Transit Gloria Mundi" - and she was ...
By the time everyone's set up and ready, it'll have to be renamed as a Christmas Fayre.

Dearieme. Poor Ron.
My goodness...some folk are sharp first thing in the morning.......

Still....Dave has given me pen and paper to make a list of those eager for the chance to ride pillion on his moped for the burning hoops display.

Thank goodness for my years of forging signatures...Ael!!!!.....Ha!... ☺☺☺
Those used condoms I got off ebay were a bargain. Love the story Mrs O.
the Russian ones, marval? too small and with a hole in them as they had been shipped into Dublin, c/o The Geraldine Cistercian Sisters nunnery.........

Great writing, mrs o......red pens at the ready, I hope.
I sent BobtheTurkey for extra orange buckets and am well stocked up on new Mop Heads (Not Mopeds) and Zoflora.
The job's never been the same since they invented e-mail :-(

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