Obsessive Behaviour running me down - Help!

[Mowbray]

since i've been with my partner for 9years i have always behaved obsessivley.  this is really getting me down and it's affecting my life and relationship.

The behaviour ranges from if she's 5minutes late from work (i panic!) to if she's driving long to town i worry incase something happens.

I really need to see someone about this as it's affecting me alot as sometimes i behave irrational.  Would i have to see a councellor or a psychtrist?

If i went to my doctors and i asked to see one of the above would they ask why?

I am embarrassed about this behaviour but i can't stop it.

:-((

[jno]

This is about obsessive/compulsive behaviour, though I'm not sure it's what you have - sounds more like a form of extreme jealousy (I don't mean that in a bad way, it's obviously a medical problem). I imagine your doctor would want to know why you want a referral, but I wouldn't worry about telling him/her, they've heard everything before and are bound to confidentiality.

[Mowbray]

Hi jno,

it's definately not jealousy.  It's me worrying incase something happens to her like an accident or something.

Sometimes when she goes to the shops i worry incase someone has abducted her.

I know this is totally insane but it is really affecting me badly.

[jno]

yes, I didn't really mean jealousy in the usual sense - you're not worrying that you'll lose her to someone else but worrying that something will happen to her. I do think you're right to seek help - you should never let embarrassment stop you seeing your doctor, and I think that should be your first port of call. Good luck.

[Grimalkin]

I think you should ask for a referral from your GP.  S/he would have to ask why (to write the referral), but, as jno says, they won't judge you.  It is good that you have insight into your behaviour - the first step towards changing it.  Good luck.

[Mowbray]

I think it's a mixture of obsessive compulsive disorder and insecurity.  as i have very insecure feelings all of the time.

[LauraLou]

Hi Mowbray,

I get a similar thing, I constantly fear the worst for my bf, and sometimes for me too, if I am driving for example. I'm always afraid something bad is about to happen.

I think you should see a GP and just explain, you may well be able to talk it out with a counsellor. In the mean time I tell myself that I have been wrong EVERY time so far, so just relax.

My bf is racing a motorbike at Donnington today so imagine how I'm feeling today!

[Mowbray]

Hi Lauralou

i bet ur not as bad as me though as i sometimes have to ring my partner on several occassions throughout the day to see if they're ok.

totally insane i know . but the feelings are to overpowering.

[KittyGlitter]

Don't be embarrassed, everyone has their own insecurities in different ways and levels. It sounds like you need someone (a professional, not a friend) to help you understand why you get like this. Perhaps at the moment you are getting these feelings, but you don't know why you get them? I would have a chat with a doctor who you get on well with and see what they recommend. A pyschotherapist might be worth seeing as they help people to analyse themselves and dig deeper into their behaviour. Let us know how you get on..

[Cockney_si]

How about persuading her to attend a Karate/Judo/self-defence class so you at least know that if she were to be abducted she would be able to put up a fight.

You need to do things when she's not around that take your mind off her too.

[RogK]

Remember, Mowbray, that there is nothing new under the sun. Your doctor will have seen it all before and will be well qualified to advise you. Good luck.

[holden]

Dont be embarresed about it, alot of people have this kind of problem. jour doctor is the first to help, and put jou to the right person, probably councelling etc. it is good that you reckognise it is becoming a problem for jou.