The end to a four Year relationship
My recent boyfriend and I have been dating for about 4 years. I met him in collage, and fell really hard, it was my last semester. I never really dated that much, or recieved alot of attention from guys. I dont have that much self worth, and felt like I had found someone that understood me, and that I could build a future with. We moved around quite a bit after I graduated, and well, I really don't have any friends besides him. I do have a good job now, and a place of my own, but he is a huge part of my life. He is my sholder to lean on, and my compainon to do everything with. I know that what we have isn't real love, he calls me names, and doesn't know the true meaning of forgiveness. For a while, I just kept telling myself he would change those small things because he is a good person, he just has some anger issue (never has he hit me). However now I am really not that sure that he can change. He has two children from a previous marrrige, which the mother has recently forbaid me to be around. Two days ago was the last straw for me. He called me a ***** again, and I flipped. I have a slept with my share of men in the past, but that is not the same person I am today. And I know I am not a *****, and will not let someone who "loves" me call me that. However the problem is now, I don't know how to really let him go, and make sure I don't go crawling back to him because I am lonely and want a friend to hang out with. i still really love him, and the problem is, I could still see a future with him. Help, I don't know what to do to ensure that I get a man I really deserve.