Quizzes & Puzzles0 min ago
Which one...
9 Answers
I dont know where to start, i cant exactly put this into context. ive somehow got myself into the situation where i'm involved with 2 people at the same time. at the moment it's all a bit innocent. One of the guys is the brother of one of my close friends, and the other is a guy whos always liked me and ive always liked him but we've both been in relationships until now. I feel loyal to both guys as they're both my friends. Im starting to fall for both of them equally, theyre both perfect but i need to sort it out before it all gets complicated and hurtful. Does anyone please have any advise on what i can do to decide? Even if its stupid like making a list of pros and cons. I thought about not being in contact with either of them for the same about of time and seeing which one i missed most. But thats just horrible, everything i think to do is horrible. I feel so selfish and guilty. i havent liked anyone for over a year and now 2 guys have come at once, i really need some help....
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"Torn between two lovers, feeling like a fool, loving both of you is breaking all the rules..........."
That was a song in the 80's which was out when I was in the same situation as you. As it turned out, although I chose,I ended up with neither of them eventually!
Anyway, I think your desicion (if you really feel you must make one) is probably down to your age and which point of your life that you are at.
If for example, you are at a stage of life where you like going out at night until all hours and are generally a social butterfly, then the guy most compatible to this situation would be the best bet.
If however, (and bearing in mind you like them both equally) you are looking towards marriage and children, then you may wish to consider the one with the better prospects, the more considerate nature and the more settled in his personality, if you think these qualities are important in a husband....
Can you not just date both of them? Does it have to be one man for one woman unless you are serious? Eventually you would know because you would crave the company of one more than the other.
That was a song in the 80's which was out when I was in the same situation as you. As it turned out, although I chose,I ended up with neither of them eventually!
Anyway, I think your desicion (if you really feel you must make one) is probably down to your age and which point of your life that you are at.
If for example, you are at a stage of life where you like going out at night until all hours and are generally a social butterfly, then the guy most compatible to this situation would be the best bet.
If however, (and bearing in mind you like them both equally) you are looking towards marriage and children, then you may wish to consider the one with the better prospects, the more considerate nature and the more settled in his personality, if you think these qualities are important in a husband....
Can you not just date both of them? Does it have to be one man for one woman unless you are serious? Eventually you would know because you would crave the company of one more than the other.
Allocate each guy either heads or tails and flip a coin.
If it lands on tails and you find yourself wishing it was heads then hey presto, you got your answer.
No one ever likes two people in exactly the same way. I've said this before. Ultimately, if you shove a gun to the head of a person proclaiming to like two people equally then that person will have a very sudden revelation! (As a course of action I don't recommnend it, people can be very unforgiving about this sort of thing). So if you really think you like them in exactly the same way then I put it to you that you're probably just stalling and it'd be up to you to figure out why you're doing that. It could be as simple as grass is greener syndrome but it might also be that you don't feel ready for a romantic relationship.
If it lands on tails and you find yourself wishing it was heads then hey presto, you got your answer.
No one ever likes two people in exactly the same way. I've said this before. Ultimately, if you shove a gun to the head of a person proclaiming to like two people equally then that person will have a very sudden revelation! (As a course of action I don't recommnend it, people can be very unforgiving about this sort of thing). So if you really think you like them in exactly the same way then I put it to you that you're probably just stalling and it'd be up to you to figure out why you're doing that. It could be as simple as grass is greener syndrome but it might also be that you don't feel ready for a romantic relationship.
More then likely if as you say you like both equally even going away can just make you miss out on both equally or else it can go completly the other way and help you to choose.
Write out what you even like and don't about either and see who you can see more likely do be what you want.. because you never realise when you like two people who you like best untill you pin point what exactly you like and exactly what you dont!
But depending on how far and how old you are can also depend on this situation.. and " Le chat " as said.
If your young or even not wanting to settle just yet why not just date both you have nothing stopping you at this moment .. but if you think they could be long term.. try figure out which would be more suitable for yourself.
Write out what you even like and don't about either and see who you can see more likely do be what you want.. because you never realise when you like two people who you like best untill you pin point what exactly you like and exactly what you dont!
But depending on how far and how old you are can also depend on this situation.. and " Le chat " as said.
If your young or even not wanting to settle just yet why not just date both you have nothing stopping you at this moment .. but if you think they could be long term.. try figure out which would be more suitable for yourself.
"If you haven't gone too far you are still in a position of integrity. But you are in danger of leading them on if you don't decide where you are at.
If you can't work it out you might just have to discuss it with them. One of them might then decide for you. "
perfect answer, thats what i did before i read this.
kept meaning to keep you updated. im pretty much seeing one of them now, but the other guy was asking me out again, so i had to tell him how i felt and what was happening. he got really angry at first, but hes been my friend a while so he said i should go for it with the other guy and see what happens, he was obviously only saying that to be kind... but i think thats what ill do.. even though im still not sure if its the right thing to do, i feel like a weight has been lifted by telling him.
Hopefully he'll still be a good friend, hes a really sorted guy and i feel a lot closer to him after all this now.
im 19 by the way... not really looking for anything major to happen, but id still quite like a nice boy to cuddle now and again. haha. thanks everyone. xx
If you can't work it out you might just have to discuss it with them. One of them might then decide for you. "
perfect answer, thats what i did before i read this.
kept meaning to keep you updated. im pretty much seeing one of them now, but the other guy was asking me out again, so i had to tell him how i felt and what was happening. he got really angry at first, but hes been my friend a while so he said i should go for it with the other guy and see what happens, he was obviously only saying that to be kind... but i think thats what ill do.. even though im still not sure if its the right thing to do, i feel like a weight has been lifted by telling him.
Hopefully he'll still be a good friend, hes a really sorted guy and i feel a lot closer to him after all this now.
im 19 by the way... not really looking for anything major to happen, but id still quite like a nice boy to cuddle now and again. haha. thanks everyone. xx
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