What's you fave line ever

[NoMercy]

by a Stand-up-comedian or comedic actor/ess?

Mine:

Peter Kay: "If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?"

[chrisda]

OLD COMEDIAN CALLED MAX WALL WALKIN ACROSS STAGE
said he tripped on a hole sticking up ha ha

[redman41]

How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Unfertilized, now F*** O** !!

[NoMercy]

Hello guys! Nothing like a good laugh, is there? :-)

In the film, Me, Myself and Irene, Irene (Renee Zellweger says to Charlie/Hank (Jim Carrey): "Did you just refer to yourself in the fourth person?" Classic!!!

[Marijn]

Are you enjoying that sandwich, Dud?

[ianfran]

Hiya Mercy

Did you get the butcher in the shops, lucky man?

Lol
x

:0)


This one is a classic:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_IBgk05iL3Y

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v_IBgk05iL3Y

play it cool trigg!

[sqad617]

Ian

"Did you get the butcher in the shops, lucky man? "

Don't get it????

[moonshadow]

''A good storyteller never lets the facts get in the way. Goodnight, thank you and may your god go with you''. I really miss Dave Allen.

[NoMercy]

Hey Ian - nothing took my fancy down at the shops, I'm afraid! lol

Funny you should mention Only Fools..........

At the time of the BSE crisis, Del and Rodney went to the Nag's Head. They ask Mike what's on the menu for the day, and he says, "Beef."
After some joking, he assures them that it's British Beef. Suddenly, Trigger pipes up, "Nothing wrong with British Beef. I've been eating it all my life!"

Del looks at Rodney and they both say in unison, "Egg and chips please, Mike!"

[NoMercy]

Sqad - I said I was going to the shops in Gandia to have a butchers and Ian, with his filthy mind, suggested that I was going to have a butcher! lol

[sqad617]

Del and Raquel in the "greasy spoon" after he found out she was a strippergram girl.
Cafe owner.."Del, you are wanted on the phone"
Del.."Who is it?"
Raquel..."It's probably your New York office.

LOL LOL LOL LOL

[Jan1957]

"I walked into a bar the other day.

I said ouch, it was an iron bar."

Well you really had to hear Tommy Cooper say it.

[Gormless]

Bluebottle: Eccles what are you doing here?
Eccles: Everybody gotta be somewhere

[~max~]

From Spaced (a minefield of great lines!)

"I want you to see me as a whole, Brian!"
"But I do...."
"I meant a WHOLE, Brian, with a W!"

[NoMercy]

Hey Jan - When Tommy Cooper used to get a taxi, he stuff something in an envelope and say, "Have a drink on me!"



It was a teabag !!! lol

[ianfran]

yeah!!!! - what mercy said, squiddly !!!!

besides, it was private! ok?

:0)

[sqad617]

NoMercy...arghhh!!! right?

[ianfran]

moonsahdow - agree 100% - Dave Allen was brilliant!

:0)

[ianfran]

moonshadow - agree 100% - Dave Allen was brilliant!

:0)