Jokes2 mins ago
abbreveation
why is abbreavation such a long word? and those sorts of riddles? does anyone know some more?
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Here's a load. Some are better than others:
You know those "Keep Off The Grass" signs you sometimes see in the middle of lawns? How do they get there in the first place if you are not allowed on the grass?
Why does talking to God in a church makes you religious, but talking to God in the street makes you crazy?
If you spend all day doing nothing, how do you know when you have finished?
If you were on a plane going the speed of sound and walked from the back of the plane to the front, would you be walking faster than the speed of sound?
If man evolved from monkey and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? Why didn't they evolve too?
If swimming is such good exercise, why are whales fat?
Can you breathe through your nose and mouth at the same time?
Do octopuses have arms or legs?
Who was the first person to see a cow, and think what would happen if I pulled those dangling bits and drink the liquid that comes out?
If a cat always lands on its feet and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat?
Why does your nose run and your feet smell?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
If you stole a pen from a bank then would it still be considered a bank robbery?
Why is it called pineapple, when there's neither pine or apple in it?
If you have x-ray vision, and you can see through anything, wouldn't you see through everything and actually see nothing?
Why is it you're 'in' a film, but you're 'on TV'?
Can someone give up lent for lent?
You know those "Keep Off The Grass" signs you sometimes see in the middle of lawns? How do they get there in the first place if you are not allowed on the grass?
Why does talking to God in a church makes you religious, but talking to God in the street makes you crazy?
If you spend all day doing nothing, how do you know when you have finished?
If you were on a plane going the speed of sound and walked from the back of the plane to the front, would you be walking faster than the speed of sound?
If man evolved from monkey and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? Why didn't they evolve too?
If swimming is such good exercise, why are whales fat?
Can you breathe through your nose and mouth at the same time?
Do octopuses have arms or legs?
Who was the first person to see a cow, and think what would happen if I pulled those dangling bits and drink the liquid that comes out?
If a cat always lands on its feet and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat?
Why does your nose run and your feet smell?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
If you stole a pen from a bank then would it still be considered a bank robbery?
Why is it called pineapple, when there's neither pine or apple in it?
If you have x-ray vision, and you can see through anything, wouldn't you see through everything and actually see nothing?
Why is it you're 'in' a film, but you're 'on TV'?
Can someone give up lent for lent?
and some more...
Are people who are allergic to nuts allergic to coconuts too?
If heat rises then shouldn't hell be cold?
Why are shampoo suds always white, regardless of the colour of the shampoo?
What colour is a mirror?
Why is ice clear but snow white?
Why does "flammable" mean the same as "inflammable?
If a word in a dictionary is misspelled, how would you know?
Why is it that when you tell a human there are 400 billion stars he will believe you, but when you tell him there's wet paint he has to touch it?
Why do they call things you send by ship "cargo" and things you send by cars "shipments"?
Why does the sun lighten our hair but darken our skin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is a boxing ring square? Surely it should be round if it is a ring?
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavouring, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why do they say "an alarm goes off" if it's really going on?
What do sheep count when they can't sleep?
Why do mattresses have designs on them when they're always covered with sheets?
Why do people press harder on the buttons of a remote control when they know the batteries are dead?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why do they call it a TV "set" when you only get one?
Are people who are allergic to nuts allergic to coconuts too?
If heat rises then shouldn't hell be cold?
Why are shampoo suds always white, regardless of the colour of the shampoo?
What colour is a mirror?
Why is ice clear but snow white?
Why does "flammable" mean the same as "inflammable?
If a word in a dictionary is misspelled, how would you know?
Why is it that when you tell a human there are 400 billion stars he will believe you, but when you tell him there's wet paint he has to touch it?
Why do they call things you send by ship "cargo" and things you send by cars "shipments"?
Why does the sun lighten our hair but darken our skin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is a boxing ring square? Surely it should be round if it is a ring?
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavouring, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why do they say "an alarm goes off" if it's really going on?
What do sheep count when they can't sleep?
Why do mattresses have designs on them when they're always covered with sheets?
Why do people press harder on the buttons of a remote control when they know the batteries are dead?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why do they call it a TV "set" when you only get one?
and a few more for good luck!
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called "rush hour"?
If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
If a person owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way down to the centre of the earth?
Can blind people see their dreams and do they dream?
If the world's most popular first name is "Mohammed" and the most popular surname is "Chang", how come I don't know anyone called "Mohammed Chang"?
If the "black box" on an aeroplane is usually the only thing to survive intact in a crash, how come they don't build the rest of the plane out of the same material?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called "rush hour"?
If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
If a person owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way down to the centre of the earth?
Can blind people see their dreams and do they dream?
If the world's most popular first name is "Mohammed" and the most popular surname is "Chang", how come I don't know anyone called "Mohammed Chang"?
If the "black box" on an aeroplane is usually the only thing to survive intact in a crash, how come they don't build the rest of the plane out of the same material?
1 to 12 of 12
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