Guillotine

[scakebread]

During the French revolution an Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman were arrested and sentenced to death by guillotine. They were all led out to be executed and the man in charge of the guillotine said to them "I like to make things interesting for the spectators, so I always give my victims a choice: you can either be face up or face down on the guillotine. Which do you prefer Mister Englishman?"
"Well, we English prefer to face our dangers, so for me, face up."
He was taken to the guillotine and placed on it face up. The man pulled the lever and the blade dropped... a short distance and stopped!
"Incroyable! As a reward for your bravery Madame Guillotine has decided that you are to be set free! You cab go."
And now, Monsieur Scotsman: which way for you?"
He thought and decided that it had been good luck for the Englishman so he said "We Scots are no less brave than any Sassenach! Face up for me!"
Once again the guillotine was prepared with the Sdotsman facing up, and again the blade stopped after falling a short distance.
"Mon Dieu! Madame Guilotine has decided that you too are to go free!"
He then turned to the Irishman "Well, which way for you?"
The Irixhman thought that it had been ok for the other two so he said "Sure and oi'll go so I can watch what's happening. Like them oi'll go face up!"
He was arranged on the guillotine and the man in charge was just about to pull the lever when the Irishmen suddenly seid "Wait a minute there! Oi can see where it's sticking to be sure... "

[scakebread]

Oh yes, apologies to any Irishmen (or women) reading this. As has been pointed out, it rather predates 'political correctness'!