Sex Games on the internet

[lovehearts]

Ok what im about to tell you is a bit crazy and I'm glad i've found a space i can be anon and get this off my chest.
It started about 1 1/2 years ago. I met this guy on the internet and we got sexy chatting. He is 4 years younger than me... Only a young guy in his early 20's. And i'm like bored and enjoyed our flirting... Anyway our flirting moved onto MSN and we started using the web cam. He was great, a good friend, i confided in him when i really needed someone and he was always there. But i started to get naked with him, it was just a bit of fun. But now its getting a bit more serious and I kind of like this guy now. He says he likes me too and want to meet me, which im willing to do. The only problem is that im not so keen on the whole getting naked thing anymore, but still want to be his friend... But without the sex chat it seems we dont have a lot to talk about... I know, you can call me all the names under the sun, ***, ***, ***, im none of those. I just wanted some fun, do something a bit different and naughty, which i've now taken to new levels. Its like im addicted :) It is becoming a problem and i know you would just say stop, easy, problem solved but i like this guy. BUT he always seems to have the upper hand. He's like smarter than me or something, idk... I dont know what the real problem is or why im writing in to tell you about this but suppose i need someone to talk to about it... Ask me questions about how i feel about it. Sort it out in my head what im actually doing.... It used to make me feel good, but now im beginning to feel a bit funny about the whole thing, but i really like this guy. You will say if he likes you too then he will not mind stopping what we are getting up to, but half of me doesnt want to stop, but then i really do want to stop. I talk to him EVERY night... Have done for a long time now.. He's like a boyfriend over the internet. I cant be the only one thats in this position out there...??

[lovehearts]

how do i handle this? do i just end it with him? I was planning visiting him? he says he's not using me but deep down im letting myself be used, but at one stage i was enjoying it. I still do enjoy it and it brightens up my nights :)
Can you give me a good way to get the upper hand, as he always seems to be the one in charge and i dont like it, im starting to feel like i've got a pimp. I told you it was crazy!!! So simple as well but i just dont know how to handle this situation. Please help.

[Mamyalynne]

It`s run its course, the novelty has worn off, now move on and find someone in the real world. Don`t be down on yourself this was just an episode.

Take care

Mamya x

[lovehearts]

Thank you!

[tinkerbell23]

yeah i agree think its run its course...for a while i done my thing...had my fun..but then began to feel a bit sh!t about myself for giving it up so easy if you know what i mean?? glad i had my fun and my experiences...BUT now i have moved on and i want something different !! nice meals and being taken out...get to know someone..maby thats what your after, im sure its certainly what you deserve hunni!! mwah take care..xxxxxxxxxx

[bobjugs12]

Lovehearts, instead of turning your pc on why don't you go out with your mates instead? Find yourself a bloke in real life, and learn to have fun again.

[CuteToni]

The key thing I am reading from your posts loveheart is that YOU are feeling uncomfortable now so it IS time to stop. Tell him how you feel, he may be annoyed but better to do it now before you meet and he expects a physical relationship immediately. I do know couples who met on the internet so it CAN work out.

[andy-hughes]

I suspect that you are drawn to this cyber-relationship because it gives you an element of control, and i I feel from your posts that you are quite insecure in relationships, which is why this type of interaction works for you.

As you have realised, making this 'real' is a whole new ball game - it can't be comfortable meeting someone for the first time, when they already know what you look like naked!

I would advise that you cut your losses and move on. It is unlikely that a 'real world' relationship with this guy is going to work - you will both have too many issues at the start which will be difficult to overcome.

If you want to stay cyber-friends, fine, and cut down on what ever does not make you feel comfortable, but I would avoid any face-to-face contact.

Try and develop a social life with some friends - no pressure - relationships which find and develop their own level are fare more comofrtatble, and likely to be successful.

Take everything a step at a time, and remember - everyone else feels insecure too - they may just hide it better!

Good luck.

[Panic Button]

If you suddenly stopped communicating, is there any way he could get hold of you?
Does he know your name or address?

If not, just stop doing it.

He is just doing it for sexual pleasure, so if you are not comfortable, pull the plug.

[joko]

you keep saying you like him...do you mean youd like to become a proper serious couple?
if so im sorry but i doubt that will happen... he sees you as a sexy girl he can have some dirty fun with by the sounds of it...not relationship material...sorry, its sad to say but i think thats how most men would see this...they would not want their girlfriend naked online etc...he may think you have a whole host of men on there...

all you can do now though, is test him...hold back, change the rules etc ...and if he still keeps in touch then great - hes obviously become a proper friend - but if not then hes no real loss is he? just leave it as a bit of fun...but you must stick to your guns and not get drawn back into it.