A man goes in to a Tesco Metro for a sandwich one day to find his wife with
another man walking around doing some shopping. He leaves and goes
back to work enraged at what he saw. He decides not confront his wife
but to keep going back to the Metro to see if this is a regular thing. To
his dismay he finds that it is, and that it happens every Friday
lunchtime. The man keeps quiet for a couple of months going to Tesco Metro
every Friday lunchtime in order to follow the unknown man and his wife
around the shop.
The man can take no more and begins drinking in his local every chance
he gets. One evening he is telling a man at the bar about his dilemma
and asks him what he should do. The man replies that he knows someone
who would do them both over and will arrange a meeting if he wants. A
meeting is arranged for the following evening in the pub.
The man is introduced to a huge bloke called Arti. He tells him the
story and Arti says that he will do them over together in Tesco. The
man asks about a fee and Arti tells him that he loves to kill people
and will accept a token fee of a pound. The deal is done and the place for the deed
is set at the Tesco Metro on Friday lunchtime.
Arti awaits their arrival and follows them around the shop for a while
and then pounces on them, strangling them both with his bare hands. As
Arti runs out of the shop two security guards tackle him to the ground
and wait for the police. He is caught and tried for murder and found
guilty. The headline in the paper the next day read:
ARTI CHOKES TWO FOR A POUND AT TESCO