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Are men not allowed families?.

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DaveW58 | 08:07 Tue 27th Mar 2012 | ChatterBank
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I have been widowed since 2009 and have been a member of 2 bereaved clubs since that date but have now left both.
The majority of the members are women and I have dated 2 since I have been a member.
In both cases they wanted me to will my estate to their children as they have both stated their families are the most important and have the support of other members.
I have 2 daughters and 3 grandchildren. Are they not important?.

Dave
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Dave you're well shot of em, nothing less attractive than greed. Of course you are entitled to a family and since I split up with my wife ( we're now sort of back together loosely) I dated other women and have to say I didn't find this scenario with any of them. I think you've maybe been unlucky, just keep your eyes open and the right girl will come along eventually.
I've seen this question before....
You are meeting the wrong sort of women... If you learn to like/love the new persons kids it wouuld not be unreasonable for you to leave them something if you chose but your own children would surely be your priority....Try asking them to leave their property to your children see how fast they run... seems these ladies are simply out for one thing... Try somewhere else to meet people maybe a rambling group or an evening class

I hope you find someone I'd be horrified if a man I met would think so little of his children they didn't come first... a partner would always come second when children are involved in my book.
You have been unfortunate and met 2 'golddiggers' there are women out there who are looking for a genuine partner , but I have heard many stories of women who re just after money.
There was a post on here a few weeks back from a man who allowed a new partner to come and live in his house, within days she was demanding he change his will to leave the house and entire estate to her. He took advice and got rid of her.
EvianBaby

You said ''I've seen this question before.... ''.
You are right. I have seen it and the same situation happened to me but I did not post anything about it.
I know 3 other men who have had this happen to them but I do not know any men who have wanted the women to will their estates to their family.
I wander what reaction I would get if I tried?.

Martin
I imagine they'd tell you to sling your hook Martin, like any right minded person male or female.
-- answer removed --
As posts on here seem to confirm , this situation is common.
There are huge numbers of women , mainly but not always elderly, that are looking for a man as a 'meal ticket' I know a lot of older men who are widowed and have houses, virtually all of them have met women who turn out just to be after their house and cash.
DaveW58 and MartinBev58

Pity you can't meet me! I would be happy just to have a nice man to go out with. I wouldn't dream of wanting anyone's money or possessions, even though I haven't much of my own. :)
I was widowed in 2007 and my mother passed away the same year.
At the time I was still working and my father had a partner for a few months.
Prior to her arrival my father and myself decided there was no point keeping 2 houses and mine was sold and I went to live with my father as I had inherited my mothers half.
My father befriended a woman about his age but he did say to her he only now owned half of the house and the other half was willed to me.
I had paid about £40,000 for various work to be done on the house by that stage some of it was done prior to her arrival and some when she was there.
Suddenly she was wanting a new bathroom in the house and wanted me to pay for it.
I refused at that stage as it was November and I thought it was better done around the March / April time. The old bathroom was a little bit shoddy but still useable.
After this incident she started saying things like there was no need for a laptop in the house and waiting for me to buy food and then buying something else so my food was going to waste.
She also started saying I should get married again even though my husband had only passed away less than 2 years before.
I was going to say something to Dad the next evening as I knew we would be in the house on our own.
When I got home that evening Dad told me she wanted me to move out and obviously that was not on so she left.
Sadly Dad passed away in 2010 but I am pleased he saw the unfairness of the situation.
As it happened I had the bathroom replaced about 6 months later and an en suite shower put in Dads bedroom which he said he would like.
As it happened Dad only used the en suite once as he liked the bathroom more.

Louise
I have sweet FA so I know that my gf wants me for the person I am, not for what I have (or rather don't have).
it is not just older people who are looking for sugar daddies / mummies - there are predatory people of all ages on the look-out for new victims to exploit. Like Welshyorkie, I'm happy to have nowt worth having apart from my amazing charisma, looks and intelligence......
Mosaic you forgot something....modesty!!!!
Sorry to hear that Dave. Strange people if they think that they can demand this of someone they are dating.

Perhaps 'bereaved clubs' are not the best place to look for companionship. Either that or reject the ones that push themselves forward.
its your will you decide, i wouldn;t think a man was worth knowing if he put someone elses kids over his own (ob dependant on circumstances)
Man I work with split up from his wife and let her keep the house etc. He started going on online dating sites and met some really weird women - one wanted him to buy new clothes and another wanted to change what he ate, insisting on going to posh restaurants etc. I told him to ditch them all and wait till he met the right person without forcing the issue. He then met a lady in a chip shop while queuing for his tea, got chatting, went for a drink and they are now living together after a couple of months.
it amazes me that anyone, let alone 2 in a row would actually say those words out loud! i know of course to them their famiy are more important but to expect you to give all you have to them!?

people never cease to amaze me
DaveW58 - Join Dateline or somewhere like that. I also have experience of women at these clubs through a mutual friend who was being hassled why the will could not be changed. This was after two weeks of meeting!

How many other wills have these women had left to their kids?

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