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New Years Eve One Liners

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marval | 14:29 Sun 29th Dec 2013 | Jokes
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A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

My new year’s resolution is to be more optimistic by keeping my cup half-full with Rum, Vodka, or Whiskey.

New Years Eve is the only acceptable time to wear body glitter without being mistaken for a stripper.

My New Year’s resolution is 1080p

My New Year’s resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year’s resolutions.

I have only one resolution. To rediscover the difference between wants and needs. May I have all I need and want all I have. Happy New Year!

People treat New Year like some sort of life-changing event. If your life sucked last year, it’s probably still going to suck tomorrow.

I'll remember 2013 as if it was yesterday

May all your troubles last as long as your New Year resolutions.

I want to get so drunk that if vampires bite my neck they will get a Bloody Mary.

Many things can be preserved in alcohol this New Years Eve. DIGNITY is not one of them.

I have just heard that in 2014 there will be a new device that can turn thoughts into speech. I have had that for years, it’s called alcohol.

My New Year’s Resolution is to break my New Year’s Resolutions....That way I succeed at something!

Anyone who says that alcohol is a depressant isn’t drinking enough of it.


There have been many times in 2013, when I have annoyed you, disturbed you, irritated you, and bugged the hell out of you....today I just want to tell you I plan to continue in 2014!
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My New Year’s resolution is 1080p. I don't get it Marval. Am I being a bit thick, lol?

all very good

with regard to that last one - i hope you do....i would have it no other way

a warm 'happy new year' to you
I don't get the 1080p either. Please explain Marval?

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1080p‎
1080p (aka Full HD/ FHD and BT.709) is a set of HDTV high-definition video modes characterized by 1080 horizontal lines of vertical resolution
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Happy new to you too excel, thank you Baldric for posting that.
My News Years resolution? Not to make a New Year resolution ... simple

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