Touching my mum at work

[tigilou]

Hi everyone i need some advice. My mum 56 came home from work today in a right state the bloke she works with has for sometime been touching her like putting his cold hands down her back/face and mucking about she hasn't taken any notice just thought he was mucking about. Today she was on the phone to her boss in a small first aid room when in came the bloke, he put his arms round her and gave her a cuddle she wriggled away still on the phone and didnt say anything while on the phone to her boss, he then grabbed her again and pulled her down in a chair where he had her sitting on his lap with his arms wrapped tightly round her she tried to stop him but he would't let go (shes stil on the phone) he had held of her quite tightly in the end she got away and said for him not to do this to her and to do some work he turned around to her and said he has a problem (a problem with mum) she said she had work to do and went and done it. She is a cleaner by the way and starts wrk at 5.30am so there are not many people in the building until about 7.30ish. He is from Czechoslavakia just for info. Mum said she doesnt feel she can tell her boss as they will laugh at her her being 56 and him 40 something i said this is not the case. She hasn't told my dad either and i along with her are worried about her going to work tomorrow do you think he has got the message from today or any advice on what she can do as im at a loss as to how to help her she was very upstet this morning and says she has never done anything to lead him on or give him that idea Please can someone help me.

[PatriciaH]

She must report him to her boss at once.-you say theres not many in work at the time? what if he goes too far? itl be her word against his, please make her see sense to report him and tell your mum not to go in work till her boss is in and tell him

[VINNY100_2]

I agree with patricia,she must report this to her boss.Tell your mum Not to go to work tomorrow.Perhaps she could phone her boss,first thing and explain what's going on.Does she have his home phone number,could she ring him this evening.This person need's to be sorted out and soon.

[kaz20]

I agree - this isn't a time for worrying about what the boss will think - her boss needs to know the truth. Hope all works out.

[tigilou]

Thanx everyone we have told her not to go but she says she has to cant afford to money n that much to our disaproval etc she is going to talk to the security guard in the morning if hes there as not always about inside the building this is a massive building by the way and lot of ground outside her boss is a woman and friendly with the bloke this is why she is worrying but im gunna ring her tomorrow if i can get hold of her number thannk you

[snook]

I agree with the earlier answers, she must report him. He's a danger. If he thinks he's getting away with it, he'll likely go further. He has to be stopped. Take care of your mum. Good luck, tigilou.

[gammaray]

Why doesn't she just knee him in the bo*****s. Maybe then he'll work out that he can't behave that way.

[mullein3]

i would report him as she has done nothing wrong...a man at work put his hand up my skirt once and i turned round and slapped him so hard he had a heart attack..i hate men that act like this they are sexual predators and see women as sex objects...it doesnt matter how old your mum is she is still a woman with rights ..you dont go to work to get molested..i hope she will do the sensible thing as if he is allowed to get away with it then he may strike again..

[Grunty]

If you want to contact the security man, ring the switchboard number and you may find it is diverted to his mobile. Otherwise ring his security company which should have a 24 hour telephone service.

I agree with the others. You must not let this go. There is sometimes some fooling about in workplaces, but he is committing a serious crime if he does not know that he has her consent. If it does go further, nobody should be able to ask why she didn't report it sooner.

This must be reported to the boss straight away. And don't let her believe that a woman of 56 can't be attractive to men.

[WendyS]

This is sexual harrassment of the worst kind and I hope by now your mother has been able to report this to her boss. If it is a good company they will have a disciplinary policy about sexual harrassment and should deal quickly with the offender. Meanwhile I suggest your mother tells him loudly and firmly that if he ever touches her again she will call the police. Regardless of whether her boss is a woman and is friendly with this man, she must take action and I suggest your mother demands action within the next 48 hours. If this doesn't happen I suggest your mother contacts the police for advice. For all she knows, this man could have a real sexual problem and be adopting this kind of behaviour with other members of the public. If your mother has complained to the police and her boss sacks her for this reason she will have a case for constructive dismissal. Let us know what happens.

[tanzanya]

She has to report him now to her boss. If something happens in the future with the bloke or if she decides to pursue a sexual harassment case she will have little to stand on because she did not report it. It does not matter that her boss is friendly with the bloke - as a responsible employer she has a right to know what is happening in her company.