Nuisance Neighbour

[EliseAngel62]

Please can anyone shed any light on this for me please? I live in a block of flats, with walls like paper! - my neighbour downstairs,a 30 yr old woman, who lives with her father (who by the way, goes a way a lot and leaves her to her own devices at the weekend) walks constantly around in high heels from 6.30 in the morning till whenever. She moves heavy furniture very late at night, and every weekend has her boyfriend in for very loud sex, and chats. This all occurs only when her father is away, but there is nothing when he is in the flat. She doesnt seem very approachable, as when we first moved in, she came up to complain about my son bouncing a ball ont the floor,(which lasted a couple of seconds),and I was very upset by her unfriendliness and rudeness. We are very considerate neighbours and I am always fully aware of being courteous to her, and never wearing high heels, but these days I am feeling very tempted to give her some of her own medicine! I joke aside, but also another thing when I have company, the next night, she seems tobe in competition and has 'rent a crowd' just to do 'one better'. Please help as this is driving me mad.

[redcrx]

do you own the flat? what does the lease say about noise?

The lease for my flat states that all floorings must be carpeted to reduce noise. If you can here her below you walking in heels then i assume she must have wooden floors or something?

if the flats are rented then speak to your landlord if you dont feel that you will get anywhere by talking to her or her father.

[POLLIANNA]

I had the same problem a few months ago when we got a new neighbour. After a few sleepless night we chapped the door, introduced ourselfs and got straight to the point. She sort of apologised and that was that but the following friday night the music and party started. It was still going on at 6am (my hubbie is a postie so he needs sleep). Later on the saturday i noticed that her parents were visiting so i chapped the door and explained (loud enough for her parents to her) that i don't mind partys but she was taking the p!ss. On the saturday night it got worse so because she is only renting i went to our local council who then sent her a detailed letter of times and dates that we had complained and that if it didn't stop she would have to leave. It turns out that we weren't the only neighbours to complain and so far we havn't had any bother. In fact she has been really nice, taking the bins out, cutting the hedge ets. Think she might have been seeing how far she could go but thankfully it's ok now. It's not nice, i know but don't please don't do the 'tit for tat' cause that makes you just as bad as them. If you ask for it to stop then i would keep a note of everything and take it to who ever owns the flat, building or even your local council. Someone will always help. Good luck x

[EliseAngel62]

Thank you very much Pollianna for your advice. x

[POLLIANNA]

How strange is this, my neighbour in question has just chapped the door to say that she is having a few friends round later for a dance and a drink. She hopes that she doesn't bother us but if they are to loud just to say and she'll turn it down. How strange !

[POLLIANNA]

We had one major sleepless night last night. How are you getting on?

[EliseAngel62]

Hi! that was a result for you though, it seems as if she has seen the 'error of her ways'! I know what you are going through too, there's nothing worse than not getting any sleep, especially if you're getting up for work the next morning. I've always been plagued by 'nuisance neighbours' and I would love to move away from here, I've also had to complain about neighbours upstairs too. They were taking liberties talking and laughing till 4 am, in the bedroom above me, during a week night -think there must of been about 10 people squashed in there, great! so i complained, they didnt like it, tough, and when we meet on the stairs, there's an embarrassing silence, they never apologised, and it was as if they didnt think they were doing anything wrong- people nowadays dont seem to have any thought for others.Anyway, my neighbours father has gone away, and it will be tonight that she will let her hair down so to speak! Im hoping my son isnt around to hear her loud lovemaking, its really awkward, and she does it in the bedroom near the window, so that others in the block probably can hear...thing is, she is quite clever, not doing annoying stuff whilst her dad's there. Anyway I feel sorry for the person below her, the sound of her high heels must be deafening. I think she's quite a bully, because it seems that when I have any company and I dare to make the slightest bit of noise, she AND her father, get up especially early and move furniture around and talk in extremely loud voices, in order to wake us up..I dont know, its a difficult situation, because probably the dad wouldnt think that his daughter would cause trouble when he wasnt there. I'l keep you up-dated. x

[POLLIANNA]

Please do. I think my neighbour goes out for a drink and brings anyone back home. A few weeks ago i heard two young girls leaving the house at about half six in the morning and they were saying to each other why did you want to go back to that girls house cause i don't even know her name. Don't really care what she does as long as she doesn't bother me or anyone while shes at it. Before we moved i lived in a flat and we had an old man who was deaf, so the telly was all was really loud and because he said he couldn't sleep the telly was on all night. Did the ' Can you please turn it down' which he did but a while later it went up again. After a while i phoned the police (i was at my wits end and didn't leave my details) anyway they turned up, the tv volume went down for weeks. At last some sleep !! I really don't like complaining or getting anyone into bother bbut sometimes it just has to be done. If you are renting could not you put in for a swap with some and don't mention the lovely neighbours ? x

[joko]

as you are above her, every noise you make will be very loud to her - louder that she is to you - so perhaps she is sick to death of you and your noise?
you may think you are not making any but if she is up in a few minutes over a ball, chances are she can hear you and loudly.

i would mention it to her dad, play dumb that you hadn't realised he was away - and don't mention the sex ( he may be upset) just say she plays music and has people over etc, and is noisy - as he is quiet, he will presumably have a word

[POLLIANNA]

How's the neighbour?

[EliseAngel62]

Morning.
Well, she woke me up with her clippy cloppy high heels at 2.30am with boyfriend in tow...oh dear I th ought here we go...she clipped around, opening and closing windows noisily and,she walked around for about half an hour, and then surprisingly, no loud lovemaking! - maybe the lady who lives underneath her has made a complaint or something. It was weird, I was just laying waiting for the loud moans and groans (sounds odd doesnt it!) but none came....dont suppose it will last though..get me earlplugs ready for next time! - how's your's going. In reply to Joko's posting, I dont actually make a lot of noise,I m really considerate and always take my shoes off at the door, although we do have a semblance of a carpet, one of those 'budget' jobs, cos I couldnt afford anything decent at the time, so the floor is covered and is not laminated, and Im a really considerate quiet neighbour, I even talk quietly! - Anyway, would like to move from here, its far too big for me, and not a good area. Im hoping that wherever I go, I have pray I have good neighbours...Ive had some challenging ones over the years to say the least...x

[POLLIANNA]

Hey, next door had some people back and as i said before i'm sure she doesn't know who they are. Were getting a bit loud just after 3am but , low and behold someone (not me) had phoned the police and i heard them say that if they had to come back they would take it further. When i looked out of my window most of the street were looking out of theirs. So i'm not the only one that she is bothering. The best of it is that up here you have got to be on the local housing list to stay some where decent. She has managed to bag a three bed house has she has two small kids. It not turns out that they stay at their grandparents house and stay with their mum twice a month. Don't suppose the council would know that because she wouldn't have got the house. Mmmm .... mabye a sly letter to them would make it stop! I would probably get someone worse. Have now found out that she has put herslef on Myspace. Oh god the pics !

[EliseAngel62]

Hi, she sounds delightful! - but at least other people have started complaining about her, she's just a menace, and a pain to ordinary people such as yourself. If she's having complaints and police attend, and the calls are being logged -its not looking too great for her all round - the more they are called out, the better..maybe that letter you talked about is a good idea...
Oh, by the way, my lovely neighbour started her ohhing and ahhing at 12 midday today, not tooooo bad eh? but I could still her 'wailing' through the screams of the kids playing in the playground downstairs..and she had all of her windows open. Dont care if she does 'it'in the day time, much better than very late at night when you can hear a pin drop!..x ps

[POLLIANNA]

Oh the joys !!

[EliseAngel62]

I know...! thanks for the chat anyway. x

[POLLIANNA]

Well, how's the neighbours these days?

[EliseAngel62]

Hello again.Well her dads been back, so she's been as quiet as a mouse, so no, clip clopping, or entertaining her man, or moving heavy objects. Although it is Friday, oh gawd!- and we know she likes to play while dads out....I was in a particularly bad mood this week, and I actually clomped around in my shoes for a changed, and I have to get up early for work, and I could hear her moaning to her dad about me!!! -I think shes playing mind games..I just know that she'll be noisey this weekend, and have very very loud sex, which is really embarrassing..think she does it to prove shes got someone..I dont know. She is really getting on my nerves though, but if her dad came up to me and said about my noise, I would hand him the list of moans I have about them! - so maybe shes realised that if she takes the pee too much I will complain and land her in hot water so to speak. She's very crafty and will only make extreme noise when her dads out, if Im honest Im quite intimidated by her, im on my own with my son, and when I first moved in, her and her sister had parties from 10 till 8 in the morning, and I heard her shout to another person and say 'Oh dont worry about her upstairs, shes on her own with a kid'. So it doesnt matter then does it? I really havent like her from the off, so there would be no lovelost if we had a face to face 'discussion' about each others 'noise'. Actually I would quite relish it, as I think 'dad' is quite oblivious to what has actually been going on!

[POLLIANNA]

I'm starting to dread the weekends as well. It seems that the invisable kids are visiting this weekend so fingers crossed there will be no loud partys. Don't mind the noise that kids make, cause thats what they do. Got a letter from the council asking if we could fill in a form with details about next door, like when do the kids visit (if ever), is there any noise which we think is unacceptable etc. Don't know what to do. Someone else must have complained about her. It's like the old saying 'when shes nice shes nice and when shes bad shes a bitch ' or something like that. As for loud sex, we haven't been bothered with that , thank god. Have found out that she has a space on myspace so unfortunatly for her i have found loads out about her that she doesn't know about (i'm not some weirdo but my nose was bothering me). Think i might have found out why she has as many females round. One is the fact that she likes males and females and the other is the fact that she is in some kind of club/gang that enourages anorecics (can't spell it). What age is her father?

[EliseAngel62]

Let's hope your weekend turns out okay, and you manage to get some sleep! - will your form from the council be anonymous? or can she find out that you supplied the info? (silly question I know).. You seem to have found out some good info about her though. Got a feeling it's all going to turn out in you and your other neighbours favour somehow, council's wont tolerate this kind of behaviour and they are definitely taking a firmer stand these days. My neighbour downstairs has her niece and nephew to stay for the weekend sometimes, and this weekend looks like oen of those dreaded times also. They are spawned from the same genes, so we have a general banging of kitchen, bedroom and front doors, constantly, loud swearing and shouting, and one of the kids being allowed t bang on the walls with what it seems like a big stick. Great, and oh yes, there's her of course walking about in her high heels. Dad is also present, dont think she could cope on her own. Lovely, so weekends for me are a nightmare, which alternate between loud sex noises, high heel walking, moving and shifting heavy furniture, banging doors, loud conversations, or screaming unruly kids, doing what want, please get me out of here, I m tired of it. All i want is peace! Her dad is about late fifties, a clean and tidy man. I believe that he has another 'place' where he goes to at the weekends, as he is definitely not there whilst shes having sex, (he cant be)...at least I hope not! - aw the mind boggles......!!!! - its like a torture because you really never know what kind of noise you're going to get, and in the end you seem to listen out for it! - as I say, it fits into two categories or maybe three, when dads there, and she and him are quiet as mice.

[EliseAngel62]

Hi P
Another moan Im afraid, now the 'crowd' upstairs have started now! - from 10 till 4.30am this morning they have a crowd of them in. It seemed like there were about 20 people all stuffed into the little bedroom above mine.I had to take refuge on the settee. Even my bags are getting bags, this is getting on my nerves now, Im so ratty and irritable when I dont get my sleep..Im going to contact my noise nuisance team, (whom I have contacted before, because this is second or third time, these morons have been warned about their noise,they must be thick or enjoy the thought of sleeping on the gutter) who are useless by the way, you receive one initial letter saying they are going to do this and that, then NOTHING....they are def taking the pee with me, I find if they know you havent got an 'old man' they seem to do it more....they were talking in really loud voices, and stamping on the floor, no music though thankfully. And they all got up espcially early. Her downstairs with boyfriend in tow, were suspiciously quiet. Think shes plans to unleash the beast later on when all the kids are downstairs with her moaning and groaning. Sorry folks, but Im fed up, its either upstairs or downstairs..I wanna leave....

[POLLIANNA]

Hows things today? Why don't you just phone the police. You've got nothing to lose, it doesn't seem that they could make anymore noise. If they think that they are too loud, they will contact the right people and they have got to do something about it. You can't sleep on the couch all the time.