Following a recent rain shower, a grandmother was picking her darling grandaughter up from school and walking her home.
At one particular puddle the child stopped and bent down to look closely in the water where the rain had fallen on spilt oil causing a multicoloured swirl. The child said "Look Granny, it's a dead rainbow!"
In not knowing anything about your book, it is hard to know what type of stories and/or jokes you are after Beatrice. However I thought the above was quite sweet!
A death-type joke is:
'The Obedient Wife'
There was a man, who had worked all his life, and had saved all of his money. He was a real miser when it came to his money.
Just before he died, he said to his wife...'When I die, I want you to take all my money and put it in the casket with me.
I want to take my money to the afterlife with me.'
And so he got his wife to promise him, with all of her heart, that when he died, she would put all of the money into the casket with him.
Well, he died.
He was stretched out in the casket, his wife was sitting there - dressed in black, and her friend was sitting next to her. When they finished the ceremony, and just before the undertakers got ready to close the casket, the wife said,
'Wait just a moment!'
She had a small metal box with her; she came over with the box and put it in the casket. Then the undertakers locked the casket down and they rolled it away.
So her friend said,
'Girl, I know you were not foolish enough to put all that money in there with your husband.'
The loyal wife replied,
'Listen, I'm a Christian; I cannot go back on my word. I promised him that I was going to put that money into the casket with him.'
You mean to tell me you put that money in the casket with him!?!?!?'
'I sure did,' said the wife.
'I got it all