13 yrs and the pill

[barnacle1234]

my daughter is 13 and taking an interest in boys now is it right to put her on the pill or chance her getting pregnant but if i put her on the pill it might give her the idea that she can then safely have sex that i would not like any input on this subject would be appreciated

[Jules001]

well I have also got a 13 year old and she too is taking an interest in boys, ie she told me recently that there is a boy at school she fancies, but there is no way at the moment that I would even consider putting her on the Pill. Just because she is taking an interest doesn't mean that she is any where near taking any further steps. Just let her know that she can talk to you about anything and that she knows about 'the birds and the bees' and mention that when the time comes you hope that she will sensible about it etc. If you watch soaps you could use Coronation Street's Sarah Platt as an example of what happens when girls are sexually active at a young age. Hope this helps

[Mistopheles]

I really think the best thing you can do is talk to your daughter. I'm sure she knows the facts of life, but they might be worth re-iterating! Make her aware that she can go on the pill if and when she wants to by seeing her GP - she doesn't even need to tell you (although obviously it would be better if she did).

Interest in boys doesn't mean she's planning to have sex, but if you are at all concerned, why not suggest she carries a condom just in case? I carried them from 14 onwards - although I didn't need them until 16. I just wanted to be careful - it's easy to get carried away, so even though I'd no intention of sleeping with anyone that young, I made the decision to carry them anyway.

[kags]

I agree with what has been said above about being open with her, letting her feel she can trust you and you won't blow a fuse if she mentions sex. She won't have sex before she is ready just because you have spoken to her about it. My concern about the pill at such a young age is that it could be too tempting to not use a condom, and whilst an unwanted pregnancy is terrible, there could be worse results from unprotected sex. Mistopheles advice about letting her know she can make her own decision about going on the pill is good, and the advice about giving her condoms is vital. Good luck!

[barnacle1234]

thankyou all for your comments it has made me realise that i should just trust her as i always have

[Le Chat]

Just to add to this, it also seems that as enlightened as we are about contraception as a nation, we still have one of the the highest incidents of unwanted and/or unplanned pregnancies in Europe. So it doesn't necessarily follow that she would escape pregnancy even if she were on the pill! (As ridiculous as that may sound!)

[james_m246]

I was only 13 my first time and the girl i was with was on the pill already and she was only 14 so its not like its uncommon.

[Scarlett]

Call me old fashioned, but just because your daughter is taking an interest in boys does not mean that she will have sex with them. You can date boys for some time before feeling ready to actually have sex. Most girls have a kind of in-built defence mechanism. They may hold hands/kiss/heavy pet etc, but sex only happens when you are really emotionally ready and also, hopefully, in a long term relationship. I would have a talk with her and ask her to tell you when she feels she may be ready- even though it may be embarassing, and you will help her sort contraception then.

[duckie14]

Well being a teen myself just because you are intrested in boys doesnt mean you would have sex. We only hold hands and maybe kiss there would e somes girls who would do that but you will no you daughter put her on her if you feel she will hae sex but if you trust her dont!

[Susan22_11]

As a mother of 3 daughters in their late teens I would like to remind you that it is against the law to have sex under age. When you chat with your daughter about sex you should reinforce this law and why it was put in place in the first place. I would also say that she probably is not even thinking about sex at this age not all children are having underage sex.

[mollymandy]

slow down woman ! talk to her ,invite her chap round for tea that usually puts them right off ,,, tell her you like him , you want see him for dust ..

If he ever comes back tell him you are going to do to him , what ever he does to your daughter !!!

Only joking , keep the lines of communication open , get a friend to visit you with a small baby , ask her to baby sit ... make her ealise that actions have consiquences .... get her to think for herself ...

[a master]

i will give it time and have a word with your child and tell her that is not big and something to be proud of and that sex is not made for little girls

goodluck hope i have helped