fostering

[curiousity]

has anyone out there had experience of fostering children? long term or short tem. i am seriously thinking about doing this but would like some idea of how it has fitted in with existing family, work, going out and getting babysitter for instance. any info would be gratefully received. i know the proccess is very long and thorough but would like a more personal view on it . thanks.

[Donna69]

Hi
Do you work full time?? The reason i ask is because i only have one child and i dont feel as if i have enough time for her because i work full time.
Also when you foster you get respite, this could be someone in your family or someone they already have in their bank of respite fosterers. If it was to be someone in your family then they would just have to go through the enhanced disclosure and maybe an interview.

[tigerthecat]

I was a respite foster carer before my son was born. I had a child every couple of weekends and for a week or two during the year. This was for a child with autism. I loved it but the pay was awful and didn't cover the expenses of food and entertainment (nothing elaborate) so I ultimately spent my own money to have him. I would like to pretend that it's enough to do it for the emotional satisfation, but for me it wasn't and I had begun to feel resentful. I did enjoy the 'having a child' elemnt and will look to return to some kind of fostering in the future. I will probably seek to become a carer on the list to support children with an additional need who's parents pay for the care via direct payments as this is at a much higher rate than as a foster carer. So in short be realistic about the demands of your own children and if you have the capacity (they must have their own room) as well as emotional and energy capacity go for it. :-)

[flump1]

Hi curiosity , my husband and I fostered for a specialist agency for years looking after young people going through the criminal justice system, usually remanded to the care of the local authority. We looked afer more boys than girls aged from 11 -17. (30 in all) in short term placements. Until we started our training we thought we knew enough about teenagers and their behaviour. What an eye-opener that proved to be. !! In fact we knew very little. We learnt many new skills, from listening, to becoming non-judgemental. empathy, and the list goes on. We also learnt about the trememdous pressure on youth today and overall the low self-esteem the children committing crimes have.. My husband worked away from home and was only able to 'parent ' at weekends, so I chose my placements accordingly. I can honestly say the experience changes my life for the better. I had no idea how many damaged and disturbed children there are at the mercy of our welfare system. The children we had fitted in well with our family, even over special occasions (Christmas,birthdays). I found it easy to imagine them as a member of my family rather than a 'guest'. Depending on the age of child you are considering fostering, you may want to insure your home ! and think about having a safe in your bedroom ! If you have patience, and are willing to learn new and different outlooks , you will be rewarded with one of the most challenging, satisfiying, worthwhile times possible. it is not easy, but childcare isn't. The leaving is the hardest thing to bear, when they 'move on ' , In short !! Go for it, , if I can answer any specific question ,just ask !!! X

[curiousity]

so sorry everyone - have had no internet access since i posted this question. thanks so much for your answers. i only work part time- 3 days a week, have two boys 11 and 12 yrs, spare room and would like to foster long term, i think, not sure yet as have only just started the whole process. according to the LB Hounslow, they pay at least �200 per week - which of course is very important as you do need to pay for entertainment, days out and holidays etc. and obviously this cannot affect my family as it is. maybe this is incorrect but it makes you feel funny bringing up finances at this stage. thanks again for your answers, i will take your experiences into account as i go along the way.