Dometic violence part 1

[girlygirl]

Hi all,

My friend called me last night at 11:30pm say ing her boyfriend had attacked her and broken her hand and that her bone was poking out. She asked me to go around and take her to A & E - I live about 10 minutes away.
My Daughter was asleep (she is only 2 and I didnt want to take her out so late and esp. when there was a possiblity of further violence when I arrived)
My Husband was out on a works do (he never goes out and I felt really guilty for calling him to ask him to come back) but I did and he did.
When I arrived he answered the door and let me in (we are also friends) and I went upstairs and found her (annoyingly) drunken sleep (she had only only me about 10 minutes before!!!)
I say annoyingly because they ALWAYS do this when one or both of them drink. They have awful tempers on them but are lovely sober.
They are either literally all over each other in "love" or fighting.
I dont condone a man hitting a woman but I also believe that if she hits him then he is within his rights to hit back (IN MY OPINION!!!!)
What would you advise your friend if you were part of this and I am because she always rings me up and asks me to "rescue" her.

[johnlambert]

Call the police, domestic violence is an criminal offence

[$layer]

Hire a boxing ring for them to have a real fight to get rid of their issues

[Scarlett]

Explain to her, when sober, that you are not prepared to do this anymore. Firstly, it seems they are both as bad as each other. Secondly, you are friends with both, which makes it difficult to be caught in the middle. Thirdly, say thay next time she phones, you are simply going to call the Police. It might be a broken hand this time, but god knows what it might be next time. Then they will have to sort it out with the police/social services.
I would also suggest that they are maybe incompatible, and should just split up and find other partners!

[Janbuck]

In my opinion there is NO excuse for a man to hit a woman. He can fend her off, disarm her or whatever without having to resort to violence. If you love someone you DO NOT hit them - it's as simple as that. I don't think a man who hits a woman has the right to call himself a man - yellow-bellied coward is what I'd call him! I suppose, sometimes a slap across the face might be called for if a woman is hysterical or whatever but even that is questionable and doesn't need to be done with force. I do however acknowledge that some women can be exremely violent and that women aren't the only abused person in a partnership. I speak from personal experience but luckily broke away from my violent marriage for myself and the sake of my children. Children do not deserve to be witnesses to violent behaviour - what sort of message does this give them? I would think your friends seem to 'enjoy' thsi sort of attention-seeking behaviour and I would just let them get on with it.

[girlygirl]

Thanks guys.

I have posted my reply in part 2......

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