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Exploring your psyche

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naomi24 | 17:09 Thu 10th Jul 2008 | Society & Culture
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This question stems from a discussion elsewhere. If you really thoroughly disliked another ABer, and he/she posted a question asking for help on a serious problem, that you were able to provide, would you help them, or would you ignore the question - and what would be your reasons for your decision?
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If the problem interested me and I knew the answer I would probably provide it. Nothing p's your enemies off more than magnanimity
Laughs (but not an evil one!)

If I'm helping someone in body and soul for instance, the chances are I'm drawing on my own experience. So I'll be bu88ered If I'm going to draw on my own experiences to help someone I really dislike. I wouldn't do it in my everyday life so I won't start doing it in the cyber world. To be able to help in this way I'd have to be indifferent or like you. (Hence if a stranger falls down in the street in front of me I'll stop to help. If someone I disliked fell down I'd probably call an ambulance if it looked serious as I step over them and carry on about my business).

My reasons are simply that I don't really get off on inflicting suffering on others but if you're already suffering I'm not going to extend a hand to help you out of it. Plus I might not think you're problem is that serious.

I don't know how you can dislike someone you've never met.
If someone's in need and you can assist then you should help (good Samaritan etc) to answer the question specifically the only help you can (should) offer on a site like this is talk and even with the constant raising of inflation (see the news section) talk remains very cheap.
Offer them you're time and leave it at that.
The question really is, how responsible am I for the well being of my fellows?
I have on a number of occasions posted advice in technology for people who, when I come across them in News, I could happily throttle...
I have never disliked someone in the real life that it should stop me from being nice. How can I be like that to the people who I have never seen.

In simple words if someone has been bad to me that should not stop me from helping them. That is the least you can do with the gift of God given to you which can be of some help to someone.
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Wow... I always sort of thought I was the nice person of AB. Turns out I'm actually pretty evil. I never saw that coming at all!
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I'm the only person so far who wouldn't help someone if I didn't like them!
I forgive easily. However, there are still people I avoid on here. They never seem to need help. Never seen any of them anywhere except CB! I've found in the past, when someone needs genuine help, there always seems to be one who thinks they're funny and posts some useless facetious "advice" and I don't understand why they bother. Their attitude can surely only make matters worse.
I would help anyone on here and off here if I could. I honestly don't know how to hate.

Sometimes I despise Legend's behaviour but when he's overly abused I feel sorry for him and jump to his defence.
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Well quite Wiz. I think there'd be 1-5 posters on the whole of AB at best but it is still a dislike. As said, if I was indifferent to the poster I'd still help. It's only active dislike that would stop me from helping someone and there are just some actual posters on here who judging by what they write, I just would absolutely not care if they were suffering and would click on to the next post without a flicker of guilt about it.
I don�t dislike anyone on AB enough that I would abandon them in their hour of need, so I would help even those that irk me regardless.
I would (and have) give advice to someone I didn't particularly like on here.

Whether they choose to ignore it is up to them.

But bear in mind that often the people we 'know' on here are vastly different in their 'real' life that they are perceived on here.
Why do you hate them so much, naomi? You don't have to answer me, but you have to ask yourself that question.

You see, sometimes the things we hate most in others are the things we hate most in ourselves.
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Jock, There's nothing in my question to suggest that I hate anyone, and you've got totally the wrong end of the stick, because I don't. I would very happily go out of my way to help my worst enemy.

The person I was debating this with originally said she wouldn't help someone she didn't like, and I didn't understand that attitude - and still don't - so I thought I'd ask the question here to see what others thought.

I think an apology could be in order, don't you?
OK sorry, naomi - a misunderstanding. We cool now, OK? So don't hate me. (JOKE! JOKE! JOKE! - in neon lights).

But to answer the question, I can't really dislike another AB user as I don't know them, even if I disagreed with their opinions. Even if they had offended me, I would still offer help if they were desperate or suicidal.

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Thank you.

Me too.
When I read this before opening it, I thought of course you provide help even if you dislike the person - didn't think there would be an alternative. Obviously a bit simple minded me.

I seriously dislike some other posters posts, which I think pretty much equates to dislking the person - and I assume its reciprocal. But, if they needed help and I could provide it, whether it was serious problem or trivial matter, then to me it goes without saying, you give them the help.

Why would anyone withold assistance to another person!

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