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help please :o( mens comments welcome if you think you could shed some light :o)

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puma86 | 11:05 Fri 20th Mar 2009 | Relationships & Dating
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Please help. I'm really confused with what to do about my relationship right now. I've only been living in my area for 5/6 months after moving miles away from where i lived before and so dont have any friends i'm close enough to yet to talk this through with, so would just like some opinions from others. Ok, so.......... my boyfriend seemed very 'odd' for a few days, and when i asked what was up he kept saying 'nothing' - i thought only us girls did that :o) anyway, because he can be a naughty lad (been in prison before, arrested for allsorts - although all this was a long time ago) i worried about if he'd done anything, and i know its not a good thing to do but i checked his messages on his mob to see if he had text one of his mates so i could work out what was up. I found messages he'd sent to an ex of about 5 yrs ago, saying he "might be interested" and another saying " I got rid of my collection so I just use my hand", another read "ah poor *sarah*, do you just use your fingers" etc etc. I confronted him on this, and he says they're just mates and was all just a bit of flirty banter, and that he is like that with some of his mates - meaning the ex's he still texts now and then. He has admitted that he texts another ex with similar stuff. Now i dont see that as 'matey' texts?? is it just me? I've been hurt 3 times before by blokes that started with texts like that and then............well you know. Could it be me over reacting because of the blokes in my past or would anyone else be 'unimpressed'? Trouble is i dont know if i can go on in our relationship with him doing this. He said he was sorry i saw the texts but he's not sorry for what he said as thats 'who he is', so i'm guessing he has no intention of stopping. Why would he want/need to do this? Any ideas/comments??? thanks for your time/help in advance Kate :o)
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trust your instincts and bin him
what advice would you give to a friend if they told you this....dump him, he sounds like an arse!
Question Author
i had a slight suspicion that these would be the kind of answers i'd get. and that would be the advice i would give a friend. Just wanted to make sure its not just me going over the top
Thank you :o)
He probably does see it as harmless banter at the moment. There is no harm in exes being friends. But these messages are very sexual and no doubt if he gets the invitation he will put theory into practice. I reckon you should trust your instincts and ditch him.
-- answer removed --
Question Author
haha, you are a comedian legend!! i've seen your messages all over the place on here before. Do you not have much to do with your life.
Get a job or a hobby if you're bored you sad little man
I just wanted to get someone elses opinion, why do you feel the need to rip the **** out of everybody on here
puma....your relationship is going NOWHERE.
Question Author
thought as much. thanks everyone.

just wanted to check. but pretty certain after mulling it over today that i'm gonna get rid

thansk again
not the sort of texts i'd have with an ex! that's a bit too personal for someone i'm 'just mates with'

trust your instincts on this one good luck
Question Author
exactly what i thought, and said to him. he even admitted that he'd be 'fuming' if i did it, but somehow i'm in the wrong for getting 'the arse' with him?!

oh well
Looks like the gay-obsessed lardarse recognises himself kate.
Sounds very dodgy, wouldn't have thought most women would be happy with this behaviour but ultimately it's your call.

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help please :o( mens comments welcome if you think you could shed some light :o)

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